My Son!

(please don't drink and drive)

his first cry

his first fever

his first runny nose

his first skinned knee

his first day at school

his first puppy love

his first girlfriend

his last breath

 

Reviews

[Chelsea]

A mother should never know what it feels like to lose a child.
It's beautifully short and to the point. I'm sorry for your loss.

[Laura E. Aranda]

No way! this really startled me! I was not expecting it to end this way....nor you I suppose! I sympathize for the mother and family left behind in this very real poem!

[Michael]

D-

this is another one that speaks volumes with such a few words. You put a turn in the end that really hits hard. Very effective too. I am torn to suggest anything as it is so close to you but if you wanted to soften it up you might try a line like "his first day in heaven" to end it. Don't get me wrong, I like it as it is, it was just a thought.

[laceyjane23]

such a strong poem! i like it, it gets a very strong message across, we never think of the simple things about someone until we lose them, great job!
laceyjane