Just One More Minute

The clouds are so gray

I believe it's going to rain today

 

Maybe wash away these lonely tears

I'll be missing you in the coming years

 

I love you so very much and I always will

Wish I could go back and make time stand still

 

To spend just one more minute with you my love

But the angel's came and took you to the heaven's above

 

Now I must wait until the day they decide to come for me

For to see you again and to spend with you all of eternity

Reviews

[alyssa]

When i read this i felt the chills up my spine..it was soo sad but writen soo well.. i feel your pain and you arein my prayers.love your poetry
alyssa

[Suelou]

So very sad. I feel your pain. I am so sorry for your loss.

[Silent Kim aka mizmetap..]

The lost of a love one, especially when those times that were special, birtdays, holidays. Memories of the good times, make us nostalgic. We get into a melocholy mood until it passes.

In this write you bring this feeling to the surface, so calmly and tranquil.

Just don't dwell, until it consumes you. You must keep living.

Write these feelings until they rest dormaint in your heart again.

[Hotel Mornings]

Aw, this is so heartbreaking. The rhyme scheme fits perfectly and flows well. It really doesnt look like you tried to force any rhymes which is always a good thing. The form of the poem is lovely itself, if you kind of stretch your imagination it looks like steps up into the gray sky, heh. I love the ending, but it's still so heartbreaking. nice.

[Poeticpiers]

A very sad presentation but spiced with hope for re union in the future.
rhyming couplets well used to convey your message clearly
Your varying line lengths almost present a picture of a topless pyramid but tend to interfere with the free flow of your words when read aloud