Farmer's Daughter

The farmer’s daughter

Walked through the yard

As the chickens clucked

And the horses neighed

She walked right past

The hungry cows

And didn't glance

At the noisy sheep

There was one thing

On the girl's mind that day

As the farmer’s daughter

Wandered through the yard

As the chickens clucked

And the horses neighed

　

She squinted at

Though didn't really see

The John Deere Tractor

Shining in the sun

The ducks flapped their wings

Vying for her attention

She didn't notice

And continued walking

There was one thing

On the girl’s mind that day

As the farmer’s daughter

Strode through the yard

As the chickens clucked

And the horses neighed

　

　

The tears were starting

To gently roll

Down her cheeks

Dusted with freckles

There was no hand

To wipe them away

They were stuffed in the pockets

Of her ratty jeans

There was one thing

On the girl’s mind that day

As the farmer’s daughter

Trudged through the yard

As the chickens clucked

And the horses neighed

　

She pulled her hat

Lower on her face

And stopped in front

Of the fresh mound of dirt

Her eyes were blurred

And the stone unreadable

The ground was dark

Where the tears fell

There was one thing

One the girl’s mind that day

As the farmer’s daughter

Sat in the yard

As the chickens clucked

And the horses neighed

Author's Note

My first poem allowed to see the light of day.

Reviews

[Freeminded]

Ill use the two stars and a wish rating...
*I loved the repetition of the lines 'As the chickens clucked, And the horses neighed'
*I like the way that you don't tell the reader why the farmer's daughter is walking across the yard- and its not in your face the reason written at the end
---#

[Krystal Nicole]

I liked it!! I think it was very well written and I loved the repetition. However, I got kindof confused at the end. I think you might want t tell the readers who it was that died. But that's just me. All in all, great writ!!

[Christina May Shanaberg]

I feel like the gifted reviewer, here. I like that you didn't tell us whom or what died, but it seems so obvious to me. I liked the repeated simplicity of the animals going on, like any other day, again and again. Someone or something has died and has been buried. I hope that it was not her lover or her mother. The farmer, usually, being thought of as a man. Wonderful and cliff-hanging write!

[O.P. Nell]

I like it. Maybe you should easy up on the punctuation and rethink a few of the words, as I feel the rhythm of it might be just a tad off. But overall it's quite decent.

[PyroKitty24]

I loved the repetition in this poem, I think it really added to the effect~ Great write, I adored reading it! I could see everything you described perfectly!

[Sunflower 20]

i enjoyed the repetetivness, it made it sound like a folk song. other than a few spelling mistakes, like in the last verse it says:

"there was on thing"

i think "on" should have been "one", but other than that, well done :)

[..]

I enjoyed this write, it's cute and wonderful