Help me finish it

Death's ugly head,

Will appear in your bed.

Your legs will be like lead,

And soon you will be dead.

Author's Note

Add words, lines, stanzas I don't care. I just need help to figure out what else to add. For once I'm trying to get other's involved in my writing. I like the idea of people giving what they think would work. Don't be afraid to say/put ANYTHING. NO ONE will judge you!

Reviews

[The Half-Blood Princes]

Oh God, the "joy" of AAAA rhyme schemes.

Write your own poetry, you sloth.

-Half Blood Princes

[L0v3craft]

i'm with tekphobik.

and besides, persophone's right imo...

anyway, good luck with whatever you do ^-^

[Isabelle Faye]

I would add...

"Hear its rasping voice,
Feel its scaly flesh,
Running's not an option,
when you're faced with death."

However, that doesn't exactly follow your AAAA rhyme scheme, it is an ABCB scheme.

One thing to point out, you wrote:
"Deaths ugly head,"

I assume the head belongs to death, in which case you should insert an apostrophe, making it:

"Death's ugly head,"

Other than that, I love what you have so far. I wish you the best of luck in finding something that works for you.

[tekphobik]

How's it your writing if everyone writes it for you?

[Anthony Q Armstrong]

I'm looking for input. I like getting people involved in my writing.

[Lost in Wonderland]

I like the simplicity if it but if I had to add on...
Crimson stroked skies
Paint your weary eyes
No longer hearing lies
Say your final goodbyes

[Anthony Q Armstrong]

That really does fit in, I think I'm going to add it

[Lost in Wonderland]

Cool:) glad I could help

[Persephone]

I really don't think you need to add anything - The shortness of it is what makes it great - I think you are overthinking - it's a great piece!