Room Without A View

 

A white satin sheet

Drapes perfectly over

The empty bed.

 

Red curtains closed tight

Accent the undisturbed

Room’s mood.

 

A single candle flickers,

Clinging to the polished dresser

With molten wax.

 

The slightest breeze

Drifts under the locked door

To keep the silence company.

 

She sits alone in the dark closet

So she can understand

What it all means.

Reviews

[Desert Dreamer]

You have described so well this room that I feel as if I am there, the image is a bit disturbing and I wonder what events would make a woman or girl sit alone in a closet.

[Kerry O'Connor]

You set the scene so perfectly - creating suspense with each carefully measured stanza. The final lines are a shocker.Great work.

[Kena Dawn Augustine]

Nice, great imagry. Very easy to read and follow, which is nice when reading a poem. Great job.

[The Analog Kid]

I like how you personified the room and the silence and quiet time we all need. The last stanza was a good way to wrap it up and it is unexpected too.

[OT]

ooo elements of intrigue, sadness, wonder - thought provoking indeed! I think we've all braced this almost sensory deprivation type room of silence - favourite lines here definitely

"The slightest breeze
Drifts under the locked door
To keep the silence company."

it just reads so strong to me! the breeze eloping with the silence to create an even stronger fusion! I wonder though whether the closet or real or metaphysical?? hmm both perhaps

[InkSlinger]

tension, mystery and intrigue all delivered in so few lines.. super job at conveying the mood, and drawing us in.. Well done!

[Stacey]

I have been here a million times!!! You penned perfectly a process that some of us take to try to gain understanding....silence and alone. We can be our greatest champions and our worst enemies, but until you gain understanding of self it's hard to relate or have compassion with another. This is a very deep and thought provoking write.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

I'm wanting to pull her out of the closet! lol Good writing making the reader want to sympathize!

[HopelesslyDevoted]

extremely entertaining, love it!

[Ruth]

I like this a lot love! It is a really intense and the thought of her being left alone to know its meaning is awesome and haunting, a great poem xx