Life's Broken and Battered Things

Deepest dismay, steel cage of gray,

Its touch resonating ice in your bones,

And colder yet to the heart of the dreamer,

Wrapping lifeless arms around

Visions of gold.

 

The brutality that is reality,

Its bite to the flesh of the poet’s tongue -

Not an existence in this world meaner

Than the sinking of its teeth

To the soul.

Author's Note

Want to see what you interpret this to be about, though what I was aiming for is sitting right in front of you. Also, I couldn't really think of a name for this poem, so I was wondering if anyone could help me come up with a better one?

:)

Reviews

[Coyote Poetry]

A powerful poem my Poet friend. The word are direct and asked questions.
"The brutality that is reality,
Its bite to the flesh of the poet’s tongue -"
Reality can slow us down. We can't allow the rules to make us weak to slow us down. Be fearless and brave in life and in dreams. A very good poem. You made me think again.
Coyote

[devon]

Thank you! I'm glad I could make you think. :)

[Lina Grey]

Intense, precise, deep. Life can be a horrid thing, supressing the brillance nside one's mind. I love the philosophical innuendos here. great write doll :)

[devon]

Thank you very much! :)

[Mir]

I think 'Dismay' would be cool! It's gives off that sort of 'bam' factor. haha Because it's like one word. That being said, I also really like the title you have now! Personally, I don't think it needs to be changed!
I don't know why, maybe it's because of the rhyming in one line, but the line 'Brutality that is reality' really stood out to me! On it's own, it could be a statement/phrase.
I interpreted this as something being out of reach of somebody's wants, and it's teasing them in a way. At least in the first stanza. But then when I got to the second stanza, I had a different interpretation. I think the second stanza is about the realities of the world and how they like snap you back to reality. But actually, now that I'm writing this out, I think the whole poem was about that. like the interpretation I had for the first stanza kind of goes along with the interpretation of the second stanza.
So now, I think this whole poem is about how a dreamer dreamed before actually making it to reality. Then when he/she/it does get to reality, it snaps them out of their dream, therefore making them realize that reality isn't a dream? Haha wow, no I have another interpretation for the last stanza.
Writing this out, really gets your mind going!

Okay, adding on to that, I want to change that somebody to a writer. You specifically since you're the one who wrote it.
I think you wrote this because you have and have had a dream of being a writer forever, but you weren't in reality, and now that reality has snapped you out of the dream, you don't think you'r good enough to be a writer. 'The brutality of reality'. And reality bites at you, and nothing else in the world could crush you more than not being good enough to do the one thing you've always wanted.
THERE. That is my final interpretation!
And if I'm right, I just want to say you're wrong. I'm gonna keep it short and simple and just say you are so wrong.
k bye! :) haha
Oh by the way, I forgot to say how much I loved this! Even more so because it made me really think. I don't mean look it over and be like 'oh yea, I kind of get what that means'. But it really made me analyze and look at each line and stanza individually; as you can see above:P. I love things that make me think! (I'm a nerd. lol) Absolutley amazing job! :)

[devon]

Thank you so, so much! My main goal as writer is to make people think, to feel, to evoke some kind of idea or feeling or thought.

Actually, all of those interpretations are very good, and spot on! When I said in the first line of the second stanza, "The brutality that is reality", that's exactly what I meant for this poem to be about.

This poem is about reality. It's the cage, this vicious thing. You can dream and you can write and you can envision, but reality will be there to tear away at your every hope and dream. That's kind of what I was representing in this poem, and you hit the nail on the head! Smart girl! :)

But I am so glad you liked this! Thank you so much, Randa!

[Mir]

WOOOOO Iwas right! hahaha yay! :)
And you're welcome! I really did love it! And your goal was surpassed with this poem so again, fantastic job! :)

[devon]

Thank you so much, again! It means a lot coming from the likes of you and your fancy writing!

[Mir]

hha well thaaaanks:)

[devon]

You're welcome!

[.]

Very deep write,Devon. You have captured a very intense tone in this piece. Great job

[devon]

Thank you!