The Greatest Adventure

She roamed the sleepy streets

Of a curious village

In a land so very frozen

Dear ol’ Santa Claus would’ve

Been happy there.

 

And in this land so frozen,

She wandered until she began to talk

A bit out of her head.

“I could go for a lap,” she proclaimed

As she stumbled upon a gem.

 

In the whitest of snow

Was a sapphire the color of oceans

Upon oceans for her to swim.

But puzzled she was when she grabbed it,

Fore it was a doorknob, not a gem!

 

She gave it a tug -

It was only logic that if there was

A doorknob, there was a door.

After all, it was the sane thing to do.

And she was pleased to find this true.

 

Grand, spiral stairs met the cold

Of her toes, and invited

Her shivering body into its warmth.

Down she spiraled for hours, days, weeks on end

Until she came to a door.

 

“This must be the end,” she dared to whisper

As she traced her painted name

On its wood, the color

Of her favorite donkey that she’d left behind

In a world that she’d never been understood.

Author's Note

I was given three words (Santa, Doorknob, and Donkey). This is what I came up with. It has a hidden meaning behind it, and I want to see if anyone picks up on it.

Reviews

[Joey Sturgill]

I'm a huge movie buff, this reminded me of The secret garden, or where one finds something magical behind a secret door or hidden way. I found this poem to be magical. That's the image I was getting when reading it, took me back to the days when i was a child, loved to explore, and wished upon magical things to happen.

[devon]

I'm glad this poem could evoke some nostalgia! :) I'm glad you liked it.

[Accord_Insane]

It's good but the rythm rhymes are too forced :) check out some of my stuff and let me know what you think

[Revolutionary]

Alice in wonderland with A Santa Mad Hatter and A donkey for a rabbit.The return to a winter wonderland.You just gave me a great idea for a Alice in wonderland spin off christmas story.wonderful

[devon]

Thanks! And I hope the spin off goes well!

[KeeD]

Haha wow, this was so creative and cute, AMAZING imagery, i had to stress on amazing because I was actually picturing this young girl in the snow, pick up this sapphire and then in my head it turns into a door knob and like just wow.. I imagined it from start to finish. I loved it a lot. Favorited.

[devon]

Thank you so much! I am so glad you favorited!! :)

[KeeD]

You were so right about the cute smiles in your words and the cuddly metaphors. You're such a talent. Immense respect.

[devon]

Thank you so much! This is one of the kindest things I have ever had said about my writing! You are too kind.

[s y e]

Wow. This is impressive considering you we're only given 3 words!! Well done. It was cute!

[devon]

Thank you very much :)

[s y e]

Welcome! :-)

[Jordan's Back]

LOL Very Cute :)

[devon]

Hahaha, thank you!

[Jordan's Back]

Your welcome

[Bitter Overdose]

Wow, amazing poem - nice work to come up with from three random words. But then again, with your talent!
I can't claim to know a hidden meaning in the poem, but I'll give it a few of my guesses: at first it felt like maybe she found a door to a world of imagination away from the one where "she'd never been understood". And then I thought that maybe she died in the cold. Anyway, do tell me your hidden meaning if you don't mind.
It's just that only great minds think alike, and I'm nowhere near as great as yours. Loved this poem. ♥

[devon]

Thank you!!

And in this poem, I was trying to convey a girl who had begun to go "crazy" from a mental illness. The world has changed for her, into this scary, strange place. As the poem progress, so does her mental illness. It gets worse as the scene evolving around her begins to get better. At the end, when she discovers the door with her name of it, she's entering the "point of no return" stage in her mind state. She's left the world we all live in, and she's lost inside this world her mind has created.

I hope that makes some sense!

[Bitter Overdose]

It does, it makes perfect sense - I guess that is partially how a mental illness settles. For the most part, it's not a process where one gives in willingly, but either way - I totally get what you mean. :)

[devon]

I'm glad! :)