Chapter One

 

 

 I was supposed to  meet her boytoy. No doubt it was the fifth one in the last two months. So my enthusiasm at being dragged through a dusty old bar was at an all-time low. My hazel eyes were focused on my sister ahead of me, having nothing else to focus on.

The bar itself was obviously old. The walls were made of wooden planks, and the chill inside the bar made me wonder if there was insulation in here. It seemed like the usual place Elle would bring me to meet her latest conquest.

The air in the bar was thick with smoke, so much so that I almost felt like I would have to push through the thick veil to get past. The lights were dim and yet the gray air seemed to block anything the lamps gave. I couldn’t smell anything but smoke, except for a weak undertone of liquor. But I knew that if I could smell, I would have been drowned by the overwhelming stench of Elle’s perfume. It was like she bathed in it or something. The smell of smoke was so strong that I could taste it and it was absolutely awful. In my mind, this bar seemed like a box full of cancer, over anything else.

At the moment, I couldn’t help but think about how two people so similar, could end up being so different in many ways. Elle is my sister, or to be technical, my twin. Though, there wasn’t much way to tell other than by our birth certificates.

She was tall and skinny, with shining blonde hair and hazel eyes. I shared the hair and eye colour, but my hair was frizzy and long, and no matter what I did with it, it always stayed the same – one big, fluffy mess. It was hard to see my hazel eyes through my thick, black rimmed glasses.

As though to add to our differences in an almost cliché way, Elle had been the cheerleader and I the bookworm. And yet, I was always being told to be more like her.

“Jeanette!” I was jostled out of my train of thought when Elle grabbed me by my shoulder, “There he is!” She raised her hand to point at one of two men sitting at the far end of the bar. Though I couldn’t tell which one was her intended target.

“Which one is it?” I asked, attempting to sound mildly interested with what she was saying. I think my attempt failed. She looked at me suddenly, pouting. “The one on the left, obviously.”

As though on cue, the one sitting on the left turned around and looked towards us. When he turned towards my sister he smiled for a bit, then gradually, he looked at me and allowed his gaze to wander up and down over my figure, as though he was taking a moment to analyze me from afar.

Then Elle’s boytoy reached out and nudged the man next to him with a harsh jab of his elbow. The second man sputtered over his drink, set it down and looked over in our direction.

To my surprise, much to Elle’s amusement, the second man was nearly identical to the first. Scruffy, dark hair which looked fairly greasy topped their heads. Both brothers had the same sort of half-assed beard-thing, which was entirely unappealing. To me, anyways. Neither of them looked like they had properly cleaned themselves in a fair bit.

It was a typical choice for Elle, frankly.

We both wandered forward, though Elle had a skip in her step and a bold confidence that I seemed to lack even on a good day. I lingered a good few steps behind her, wondering if anyone would notice if I decided to make a break for the door.

Trapped, I reluctantly looked at both boys from head to toe. They were similarly dressed – band t-shirts and old jeans. Their runners were different, though, to my surprise. Boytoy’s shoes were black, his twins were white.

“Jeanette,” Elle started as she walked over and allowed herself to drop onto Boytoy’s lap. “This is Jared,” His arms eagerly wrapped around her stomach possessively, and he hugged her body tightly. “And that,” her head tilted in the direction of Jared’s brother, “is Gabe.”

My sister’s boyfriend just nodded, but Gabe smiled and jumped to his feet, and held out his hand to shake. An exceptionally goofy smile crossed his face, as he looked me over. Then it suddenly dawned on me with that simple action.

They were trying to set us up.

No doubt it was Elle’s idea. One set of twins dating another would have seemed “Cute” in her mind. I was appalled at Elle, and nearly missed Gabe’s hasty “It’s really nice to meet you.”

 

I shook his hand only because I couldn’t leave him hanging, but then I looked towards my sister in hopes of being able to give her a piece of my mind. How dare she try and set me up. She knew that I was perfectly able to get a boyfriend on my own time, of my own accord. I didn’t need her help.

But when I looked back at her, I found her in a rather disgusting lip lock with Jared that made me turn away in an instant and look at the neglected one of the twins.

He had returned to his seat, and motioned me to sit down next to him. Hiding my reluctance, I took a seat next to the strange man. Both of us ended up sitting fairly uncomfortably. I was leaning on the counter, and away from him.

He seemed to notice my uncertain attitude, and frowned as he focused down on his drink. “Can I get you anything?” He asked, causing me to shake my head. “I’m driving home,” I mumbled softly. This was true, though. It wasn’t like I was making an excuse to get away from him.

“Whether or not I’m driving anyone home as well, is another story,” I grumbled to myself as I looked towards my sister and her latest achievement. They were still as ‘friendly’ as they had been a few seconds ago, if not a bit more so. I guessed at this point, that I would just be driving home by myself tonight. Elle would most likely go home with Jared.

Idly, I glanced around the bar as time went on, people slowly started to get up and leave, some of which were stumbling as they attempted to make their way towards the door. It got harder and harder to ignore the strays that were left behind as the crowd continued to dwindle. The occasional man that got up from the bar side, kicked either my stool or the one that Gabe had claimed as his own.

Even the drunken people had enough sense to avoid the entangled two on the seat next to me.

 

A few bored minutes turned into an hour that just seemed to drag on and on. It wasn’t like I had anyone to talk to – my stubbornness kept me from saying a word to the poor, lonely twin. I didn’t want to give Elle the satisfaction. Although, at this point she was hardly paying attention to me.

I started to doze off as I propped an elbow up on the counter and rested my chin on my palm, so when Elle rested a hand on my shoulder and said “I’m going now,” I wasn’t sure exactly how much time had actually passed. It had to be a fair amount.

The bar was nearly empty now – a waitress was going around to the old wooden tables and starting to lift up the chairs, turning them upside down and resting them on the tabletop. There were two strays left in the bar as opposed to what had been in here earlier when I last looked around – an older man who looked like he had nowhere to go, and a young woman who was waiting for her cab to arrive.

I took a minute to realise what I had been doing here in the first place, then nodded and jumped to my feet – my car keys were in my hand in an instant. But Elle held out her hand, telling me to stop.

“I’m going home with Jared,” she announced, as though that was something to be proud of. “So, you’ve got to give Gabe a ride home.”

I looked back towards said boy, forgetting that he was even here. “Why can’t you just drop him off on the way there?” I asked, in an attempt to not have to drive who-knows-where, to drop off a complete stranger.

“Jared’s car only seats two,” Elle replied with a fair hint of smugness in her voice.

She won the argument, needless to say.

 

I led Gabe out to my car behind the bar; watching my sister and her ‘boyfriend’ rushing off to his own vehicle over my shoulder. The man I was to give a ride home, followed me, his head bowed and looking like he was sorry for something. I thought about asking him what, but used everything in my willpower to keep from doing it.

I wanted to have the least amount of conversation as possible for this ride home.

The car I led him to, wasn’t that bad – a 2001 Pontiac Sunfire, but the front and rear were dinged up slightly, and one of the mirrors had been taped on. None of this was my doing, though. I shared this car with my sister.

“Where do you live?” I couldn’t keep the silence any longer as I used the key to open my front door and popped the locks. I climbed in, and pulled down my seatbelt, while the man getting in the other side copied me unsurely. I expected that he was trying to figure out if this drive home was worth it, when the car looked like I crashed on a regular basis.

“An apartment, on the corner of Sydney and Main.” The man on my side answered meekly as his seatbelt clicked into place. Nodding, without another word, I started the car and started to pull out.

The silence was deafening. My radio wasn’t on, and Gabe continued to sit with his head bowed. Guilt tugged at my heartstrings, even though in my mind I hadn’t done anything wrong. Trying to do something to keep me from going insane, I reached over and turned on the radio.

“You can turn it to whatever,” I mumbled to Gabe, then focused on pulling out of the parking lot. The car containing Jared and Elle sped past, and a scowl instantly crossed my face – his car sat four. Five if someone wanted to squish in the back.

This had to be part of Elle’s “plan” for me and Gabe, no doubt. Whatever she was expecting to happen in the twenty minutes it took to get to his apartment, wasn’t going to happen.

The man in my car reached out to touch the radio, but glanced back up at me for a moment, as though I was going to start yelling at him, should he pick the wrong radio station. But with a few seconds of hesitation, he began to fiddle with the dial.

The radio ended up on a station that was in the midst of a commercial, only to immediately jump to a hard, loud rock song.

I focused on the road, but could see Gabe out of my peripheral vision looking at me, checking to see if I was displeased with his choice in radio station. The young man relaxed considerably when he saw that I wasn’t about to criticize him, or change the station.

From the way he was acting, I expected that his brother walked over him often, and yelled at the smallest mistakes. Gabe was jumpy, and looked like he always wanted to do the right thing – not wanting to risk getting in trouble with, or upsetting, anyone.

“Any reason they dragged you along, as well?” I asked the young man, though was trying not to sound too harsh as I spoke to him. The dark haired man opened his mouth right away after as though to speak, but snapped it shut instantly afterwards and shook his head.

“Nope, no real reason.” Gabe had said, though I expected he had been promised a date or something of the sort. I just nodded with what he said, not wanting to push the subject any further.

“Can you drive?” I asked him after hesitating for a moment. He was getting a ride home with me, had gotten a ride to the bar with his brother. I just couldn’t help but wonder whether or not he could drive in the first place.

Gabe’s face turned red with my question, and then he shook his head. “I’ve got my permit,” He replied, “and I need a licensed driver in the passenger’s side.”The man’s face had flushed a bit darker red with this statement, so I refrained from showing any humour with what he had said.

“I don’t practice anymore, though,” He said softly under his breath, unable to help but sound sad with that comment. “Jared never takes me anymore. He’s too busy for that not.”

I just nodded with what he said, knowing how he felt. “Well,” I said as I looked towards the man. The street was almost empty since nearly everybody was at home and sleeping this early in the morning. We hadn’t gotten far away from the bar yet – it was still a good twenty minutes to get to his apartment from here.

“What if you drive us to your place?” I asked him with a small, reassuring grin. “I don’t know where Sydney is anyways.” Without even waiting for a reply from him, I pulled the car over to the shoulder of the road and undid my seat belt. He was a lot more hesitant to agree with my suggestion. But, he looked like he was afraid to object. So, he undid his seat belt and reluctantly dragged himself out of the car. We switched sides and buckled in.

“Do you at least know what you’re doing?” I asked as I watched Gabe explore the controls of the vehicle. He just nodded with my statement, and cautiously shifted the car back into drive.

“Oh! Wait!” I gasped suddenly, catching him off guard. He jumped and by reflex threw the car back into park. “Weren’t you drinking tonight?” Maybe driving himself home was a bad idea.

“Well,” he mumble softly, “I ... actually just had a glass of water. I don’t drink.” It surprised me to hear that. He never struck me as the kind of person to refrain from drinking. I smiled at him and relaxed slightly. Gabe put the car back into drive and started down the road again.

“So, did you fail the test, which is why you don’t have your license?” I asked. It wasn’t a serious question, I was just being curious.

Gabe shook his head but never took his dark eyes off the road. He was a careful driver – yet another surprise for me. I was rethinking all the snap judgements I had made about him earlier.

Silence, save for the radio, resumed in the car. Both of us seemed to be at a loss for words with the car idly resting at a red light. I looked at him again.

“Do you live on your own?” It was just an attempt at small talk.

“Yup,” Gabe never removed his eyes from the road, even when they had stopped moving and there was nothing to look at. “You?”

I shook my head, even though he might not have seen it while facing the other way. “I share my apartment with Elle.”

He nodded with understanding, we both fell silent.

“How old are you?” I asked the question that had been tugging at the back of my mind for the last little while. I couldn’t just guess, since Elle’s choice in men varied from eighteen to thirty.

“Twenty one,” Gabe replied, his head turned slightly to glance at me through the corner of his eye. “Jared said you were nineteen. He was right, right?”

Of course, Jared would have just told him Elle’s age, adding mind in as well would have been redundant. I just nodded in reply, and then turned to look at Gabe directly. The road wasn’t a worry of mine right now, he seemed to know what he was doing behind the wheel.

“Do you ... have a job?” I asked him with a fair bit of hesitation. I assumed so, since he supported himself in his own apartment. Now that I had a chance to think about it, it seemed like such a stupid question.

He nodded his head and focused on a right hand turn, before speaking up again. “Jared and I are in a band,” Gabe informed me, and I nodded in reply.

The neighbourhood gradually shifted from the dingy one the bar had been located in the middle of, to one a lot nicer. It had been a gradual shift, but since I hadn’t been paying attention to the scenery beforehand, when I turned to look out the window again, I was slightly surprised.

The buildings here were obviously old, and yet well kept. It was a neighbourhood mostly inhabited by the better paid people.

The area just seemed to grow more and more expensive looking as we went on. I looked at Gabe, and wondered if he was really just in a band or if there was more going on there somewhere. He seemed to know what my look meant, and then focused on the road as he thought about what to say.

“I...” he started, obviously embarrassed by what he was going to say, “come from money,” he explained, which made sense. ““And my parents insisted that they pay for my apartment.”

“That’s nice of them.”

“I didn’t want them to, I just wanted to be independent.”

“Why don’t you just say that, then?”

“I wouldn’t be able to afford a place of my own,” he murmured

solemnly as the car began to slow and then idle at a red light once more.

“Your band doesn’t make a lot of money?” I questioned and turned a little further in my chair so that I was sitting sideways completely. Gabe shook his head as a silent reply.

“Why don’t you get a day job, until your band starts bringing in the money?” I offered my idea to him with a subtle shrug of my shoulders.

“All I can do is make fast food,” his face was deep red with embarrassment at this point, telling me I should drop the subject. But, he just kept going anyways, despite the embarrassment he was facing. “I... never finished high school,” the car jolted to life as the light turned green. Gabe hit the gas just a bit too quickly, but neither of us seemed to notice it.

I didn’t know what to say now, and he seemed to notice that. A forced smile crossed across his face as he made a quick subject change.

“Do you have a job?”

“Yeah, I do.”

“What is it?”

“I’m a secretary, in an office.” I was about to tell him that I was only doing that until I could finish university, but now that I learned he hadn’t finished high school I was afraid to mention it.

“Are you in college or something?” It was as though he could read my mind.

“Yeah, I mumbled gently, with a subtle shrug of my shoulders. “Something like that.”

“What are you getting into? Y’know, for work?”

My face briefly scrunched up as I contemplated that. But, finally I spoke up over the radio. “I don’t know for sure, I’m in a bunch of different things. But, I think I might be getting into law. Or teaching. I’m not quite sure yet.”

He nodded his head, but didn’t say anything for a bit, as though he was contemplating something briefly. “I think you’d make a very nice teacher,” he said, though the meek and embarrassed expression was actually kind of cute.

This time, I was the one to blush; my cheeks grew warm as blood flushed to the surface of my cheeks. “Thanks,” I whispered under my breath, not used to being the one complemented. It was usually Elle that got the praise, and I was left behind in the dust.

“Though, I’m sure you’d be a good lawyer, too.” Gabe dared himself to take his eyes off the road to look at me. “I could definitely picture you doing all that... lawyer... stuff.” He wasn’t sure what to call it, but a goofy smile spread over his face anyways, and it made me smile as well.

I was surprised that he hadn’t brought up the reason that the two of us had been thrown together for tonight. Maybe he was as reluctant about this as I was. I wasn’t going to bring it up if he wasn’t.

We were driving down Main Street now, on the outskirts of the rich man’s neighbourhood, though not far from it. “We’re about ... five minutes away,” Gabe informed me. I couldn’t believe that time had passed so quickly. Maybe spending time with this man wasn’t as bad as I thought it could be. I was still too stubborn to give into what Elle had been trying set up between us.

The rest of the ride was silent, though not the uncomfortable, awkward kind of silence. It was friendly, and I was content to just sit there and watch as the street lights passed by us. Gabe pulled into the loop outside a rather fancy hotel room, and then put the car into park and undid his seatbelt.

“Well, this is it,” he murmured, sounding rather reluctant to go. I nodded and climbed out of the car shortly after he did. “I guess I’ll see you around, then,” he said, as though he were waiting for something to happen.

Gabe walked around to the right of the car and I was heading over to the left, but the both of us paused in the headlights of the car, each smiling as we looked at one-another. “Can... I maybe... possibly... give you a call sometime?” the man finally asked, catching me slightly off guard. But the way he asked it seemed so innocent.

I bit my lip, and then shrugged my shoulders. The silent reply caused the slightly older man to frown. “I guess so,” I mumbled with a small shrug – I wanted to say yes, frankly, but, I didn’t want to give into my sister’s plot. “Elle can give you our number, or you can get it from Jared or something.”

He seemed mildly upset about me not being enthusiastic about it, but he nodded and forced a small smile. “I’ll talk to you later, then,” the man murmured, and started to walk past me.

My stomach ached with guilt at not just saying yes to his question, and I knew I had to do something, or else I would feel horrible about it until I had a chance to talk to him again. As he walked by, I stretched to the tips of my toes and planted a quick peck on his stubbly cheek.

He paused, wide-eyed at the sudden move, speechless that I would do something, but instead of saying anything, I just smiled at him then turned, walking to my car and climbing inside.

When he had a chance to gather his thoughts and take in what happened, the man looked back at me for a moment, with the widest smile I had seen him give all night. He waved, at me, then skipped out of the way of my car as I turned on the engine with one hand and gave him a small wave back. I started to drive away, looking in my rear view mirror just briefly as I pulled away from the apartment building.

Gabe was still standing outside, watching me drive away with his hands tucked into the pockets of his pants. He was still standing there as I turned the corner and he disappeared from my view.

As I drove home, I was mildly distracted thinking about Gabe, and everything that we had talked about this evening. It was a good thing there was hardly anyone else on the street, or it might have been my turn to add a dent to the car’s collection.

Author's Note

please bear with me, I'm new at this it could look messy XD

Reviews

[The Perfectionist]

I know what Jeanette feels like as I read this chapter, being dragged around by the changing wording flow. At the beginning, it's cliche, and even though you go so far as to denote that, it doesn't take away from the fact. This aspect of it never really goes away throughout the entire story, but it becomes less of an issue as you continue on. Your ability to describe the scenery is, in a word, broken. Pieces of it you hammer down to great effect, but other parts of it are glossed over. Actually, that's a fairly decent way to describe your descriptions of characters as well.

Jeanette's obvious feelings for her sister are shoved in the reader's face for the entire first half of the story, at which point we are treated to her ride home with the quiet one. Trying to get the reader to sympathize and empathize with the main character is very important, and it's a good effort, but you do a fair job of smothering us with it.

The conversation in the latter half of the chapter feels very natural for what two people in this situation would be like, but the air of cliche still hangs thickly over it, despite your attempts to get away from what the norm would be. Every single character we are introduced to doesn't appear to have any depth beyond an obvious stereotype, and it makes the predictable end to the chapter rather dry.

Despite the last few paragraphs, however, I don't dislike the piece. It's very well structured and well written, which is more than I can say for a lot that I've seen. It's genuinely funny (though admittedly only two or three times), and the main character is relatable, if typical. I'll certainly be reading at least the next chapter to see where you take it next.

All in all, it's not bad, but very safe. A decent choice for someone who doesn't do a lot of writing, but I'd like to see you branch out.