Losing a Friend ...

This is not really a poem but I do not see where it would truly fit any of the other catagories ... therefore I have decided to post it here ... it involves my thoughts on losing someone that has become dear to me and for whatever reasons we cannot develo

My Loss ... Our Loss ...

I am about to lose a very dear and lovely friend over the next few weeks.  It is always heart wrenching when you have those 'special' connections for someone that has become a part of your life and bonds you and your feelings together, then for whatever reason, you are torn apart.  I believe, we have made a mutual and unique connection with each other, for whatever reason, a reason that is difficult, if not impossible, to define.  There is no explanation, it just happens, but it is rare and ever so special when it does occur.  The connection is intellectual, emotional and perhaps even physical.  Having similar feelings about things, sharing those looks or glances with each other, knowing and showing that you both feel the same or have a similar reaction to something.  Having the same likes, dislikes, tastes, beliefs, and feelings make a relationship like this not only special and rare but it can also create a bond.  So seldom do people like this enter our lives, but we are so blessed when they do.  It is a shared trust in each other where you can freely share thoughts, ideas, feelings and events knowing that we will each honor this trust that we share,  throughout our lives.  People who can make us smile when we don't want to smile, people who make us feel good when we don't, people we look forward to seeing and sharing with on a daily basis are almost impossible to find, but this is part of what we share.  This person is beautiful, not just physically, but more importantly, within.  In the heart and soul.  A caring, loving, giving, real person that is so, so difficult to find today, that when we do find such a person we never ever want to let go of them.  By real, I mean they are not phony, they aren't playing games … what you see is what you get.  What they say and feel is truthful and genuine, authentic and sincere.  There is no phoniness in this person … what you see is what you get … and there is only one word for it … beauty … the essential beauty of a lovely and dear person.  No, this person is not dying … they are leaving … leaving my world, which happens throughout the lives of humans.  But this person, for a reason that I cannot truthfully define or explain, is maybe the most special person that has ever crossed my path.  My experience has been that when a person leaves, and there is no longer that day to day contact – then the friendships slowly evaporates until there is little if anything left with which to maintain the connection that had developed.  We move on in our lives, in different directions, where we experience  different events, develop new connections that will eventually lead us down different paths.  These forces take us further apart until the bonds that had brought us together and that kept us together, no longer exist.  Sure, there will be the occasional meetings where we go through the 'Hi, how are things going?' and so on, but the special connection has been weakened by our differing directions and loss of daily contact and our lives are no longer the strong bond that it had once been.  Eventually we move on with our lives, the person always being a part of our life, our thoughts and memories, but no longer an important part of our daily lives.  The part that we looked forward to every day is no longer there.  The part that warmed our hearts and brought smiles to our lips are but a memory.  The part that filled our souls with happiness and rejuvenated our spirit becomes distant and elusive.  Days in the future my thoughts will drift to this person and a smile will slowly evolve upon my lips and my heart will feel warm, but there will remain an emptiness from the loss of their no longer being a part of my daily life.  So, in some ways it is as if they have died … and in this loss … they have taken a piece of my heart, a portion that will never be able to be filled by another.  Then … I will have that empty, hollow feeling within me and I shall shed a tear for our loss.

Author's Note

... this is from the heart.