After

A response to Versenator Challenge #20, Eve sitting on the shore looking out at the sea

 

After

 

After

After the world had not ended

After God had not picked up His marbles

And walked away from the blue planet

After Adam, the serpent and Eve

Had long given up the Garden,

Had been forced to fend their way

In a world of stunning sunsets,

Miraculous waterfalls

And abundance of all manner,

In a world of famine and drought,

Of wars, alliances and subterfuge,

In a world set to destroy its own life,

After the party to end all parties,

The orgy to end all orgies

After the rainbow followed the storm

After the waves broke on the shore

Like Virginia Woolf meant it to be,

After the waves begat wavelets begat sea foam,

Eve discovered the beauty of the sea,

The feel of the brine and sodden sand

Against her naked flesh,

And was one with its nature

With the whole of our blue, watery planet

Was one with the perfection of herself.

Reviews

[Nihad Dweidary]

Spellbinding notion. I do love the theme of your poem. God, I am enjoying this challenge like no other. I get to see through your eyes- and the eyes of so many Versenators- what beauty lies within each of you as you yourselves consider writing about it. What a treat!

in a world of stunning sunsets,
miraculous waterfalls
and abundance of all manner,

Yes, the words complement the senses, unearth what the heart feels, and what the mind desires when the it is all over, when a different life begins. Eve at the shore reminiscing on the failures and triumphs of man, and absolving her heart within her body at an ocean divine. Thank you for this most wonderful write.

-Nihad

[Yira Simone]

Totally amazing. I loved the way you spoke of God, Adam, Eve, and the Serpent. I also loved the mentioning of Virginia Woolf. It was like we, the reader saw life from beginning all on, all the way to that one moment we come this woman on the beach. Also, I got from this, that time goes by, but beuty remains and can be found always. This was a very good write and I felt you did an exceptional job writing this.-Catrina

[Maria G.]

breathtaking beautiful, i loved this every line especially

Eve discovered the beauty of the sea,
the feel of the brine and sodden sand
against her naked flesh
and was one with its nature,
with the whole of our blue, watery planet
was one with the perfection of herself.

This gives us hope in such dark days, i will ponder on this for a while. thankyou

[C. Harter Amos]

Beautifully descriptive poem. I liked the way it broke into individual thoughts, one building on the image of the previous one. The timelessness of the image of the eternal woman captured the essence of the picture. Very enjoyable read. Thanks. - Mimi.

[Linda Crawford Ortiz]

David. This is a very original approach to the topic presented by the picture...original in idea too: After...something DOESN'T happen. Such a unique idea! I love the way you linked from one idea to the next, your organization of thoughts, your transition from one to the next...I can only say that I wish I had written this. I found no problem getting through it...it was a real pleasure to read. The color and imagery was sublime...there's no other word for it. And the message is clear: once we learn the lesson...we will see the perfection in ALL of God's creations.

[Christina Maria]

Mr. Eckert. This is true poetry. The flow, the imagery, the wholeness of it, all of it is beautiful. It swallowed me up from beginning to end.

My favorite lines:

"in a world of stunning sunsets,
miraculous waterfalls
and abundance of all manner,
in a world of famine and drought,
of wars, alliances and subterfuge,
in a world set to destroy its own life,
after the party to end all parties,
the orgy to end all orgies,"

I don't know how this can become more perfect.

Cree

[[untitled]]

I love the imagery of your words in this piece, it's nothing but perfect!

[Antony]

David, a revelation of our next world, will we make these same mistakes again? Not if Eve has anything to say about it. this is an excellent piece of poetry David.
Tony

[Ashly Christen]

in a world set to destroy its own life,
yep so true
humans will screw up thier own existance
the earth will swallow us up and start again
its already started....
a very nice write
nicely done
♥

[R George]

Great juxtaposition of imagery David. Subterfuge and rainbows. I am curious about the Woolf mention. I will now sit quietly and contemplate that. I'll be back later.

[Otto L.n. Pipgras]

what can I say that hasn't been said in the reviews below...this was superbly crafted, David....certainly stands the tide and passes the challenge.