After

A response to Versenator Challenge #20, Eve sitting on the shore looking out at the sea

 

After

 

After

After the world had not ended

After God had not picked up His marbles

And walked away from the blue planet

After Adam, the serpent and Eve

Had long given up the Garden,

Had been forced to fend their way

In a world of stunning sunsets,

Miraculous waterfalls

And abundance of all manner,

In a world of famine and drought,

Of wars, alliances and subterfuge,

In a world set to destroy its own life,

After the party to end all parties,

The orgy to end all orgies

After the rainbow followed the storm

After the waves broke on the shore

Like Virginia Woolf meant it to be,

After the waves begat wavelets begat sea foam,

Eve discovered the beauty of the sea,

The feel of the brine and sodden sand

Against her naked flesh,

And was one with its nature

With the whole of our blue, watery planet

Was one with the perfection of herself.

Reviews

[Nihad Dweidary]

Spellbinding notion. I do love the theme of your poem. God, I am enjoying this challenge like no other. I get to see through your eyes- and the eyes of so many Versenators- what beauty lies within each of you as you yourselves consider writing about it. What a treat!

in a world of stunning sunsets,
miraculous waterfalls
and abundance of all manner,

Yes, the words complement the senses, unearth what the heart feels, and what the mind desires when the it is all over, when a different life begins. Eve at the shore reminiscing on the failures and triumphs of man, and absolving her heart within her body at an ocean divine. Thank you for this most wonderful write.

-Nihad

[J. Hampton]

What a wonderful piece

I wrote to this as well a versonators promt.
An engageing write.....
why must we try and find satisfaction chasibg after so much thatsnot for us
getting wrapped up and obsessed with the useless ....rather than the wonder around us
when God created us in his image....so glorious

fascinating work this is .....

Whats up with...."Rachel"?

Blessssssssssssssss

[Shannon K.]

Wow. I really liked this poem. I found that it brought in a lot of different aspects of our world, whether is was religious, with the mention of Adam and Eve, nature, regarding the waves, sunsets and waterfalls, or just interesting, which was in the way that you worded it and the phrasing used to create the image in the readers mind.
I think you have done a lovely job here.
Kudos!
S.k.

[Specialk]

Beautiful piece i really like the flow and smooth imagery

[Eric]

Now this is a worthy read.

[Julie Murphy, Julie Des..]

As I'm late, as per my usual lately, there's little left to be said here. But, I have to say, this is an incredible piece of work, David. I love the repetition, the theme, the images.

[Hh/happy Bunny Lives On..]

Nice flow and imagery. Powerful and wording was nicely picked and placed. So many others have commented, so I will say that I liked this poem.





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[Mae Bee]

A very beautiful piece to read. It's powerful, the imagery is so good, not to mention the photo is gorgeous. This was a very pleasant surprise to read.

[Kira Love]

Beautiful. I love the flow of this with the repitition of "After", very powerful. Your imagery is also fantastic, painting a more incredible masterpiece than the actual photo. Magnificent.

[Crazy Cat Man]

Awww yesss yesssss.... i was waiting for someone to write a Adam and Eve reference to this pic. But I didn't feel like doing that. A truly amazing and beautiful descriptive poem.

[Cari Lynn Vaughn]

Thick with metaphor, it was a pleasure to swim through your words. Wonderful!