Heartbreak's Hymn

I woke up with half of me missing,

and drank from a bottle half-gone.

If she were here, we would be kissing.

Now how will I carry on?

'Cause she's the better half of heartbreak,

and she's the girl of my dreams.

So every night I lay wide awake,

crying over internet memes

or so it seems.

But you told me you would love me
and you promised we'd be fine.
So what happened to the lovely
lies that made you only mine?
And i thought we'd last forever-
be together to the end.
But in all my years i never
dreamed you'd be less than a friend
in the end.

And I thought that I would hold you

as you cried yourself to sleep,

but instead I'm what you once knew

and he's the man you're gonna keep.

So just walk along that dark road,

and splash puddles on my face.

'Cause after all the love that I showed,

I sleep in a lonely place,

an empty space.

The sunrise doesn't affect me,

'cause I sleep with curtains drawn.

I wish I could find a way free

and life would just carry on.

But every morning I'll be waiting,

with an eye fixed on the door.

All the doubts that I'm creating

can't stop me hoping for more

of life before.

I don't like the tears. They're falling

like raindrops down my face.

But I promise I'll keep calling

and sleep in a lonely place.

You're the one I'm never losing,

and the one I'll always chase.

But every night's another bruising.

Your memory I can't erase

or ever replace.

Reviews

[Kristan A. Mohammed]

Wow i really enjoyed reading this. It made me smile more than a couple times. That just shows how easily I can relate to these words. I like how the last line of every stanza rhymes with the previous line. Like its a summary of the stanza but also a prelude into the next one. But i must say I also loved the rhyming scheme. It really pulled this piece together and made it poetry porn. Great job. Stay Inspired.

[Not here]

thank you very much Kristan :) im glad you liked this. take care

[Riley Justine]

A really great job with this poem, as always!

[Not here]

thank you bunches riley :)

[Imperfection2aT]

I love your ABAB rhyme scheme. This poem is fascinating; you've done a wonderful job.

[Not here]

thanks imperfection :) im really glad you enjoyed it

[Tomoe Tellez]

Whoa! I really loved the rhyming in this one, and your choice of words gives it personality and meaning to the story behind this heartbreak. Great job!

[Not here]

thank you alondra :) i really appreciate the review. let me know if theres anything youd like reviewed

[Emily]

I love that first line!!
Keep it up!!!

[Not here]

thank you very much emily :)

[Rosaliine]

Beautiful piece, makes me think about my first heartbreak. Keep up the good work!!

[Not here]

thanks rosaline :) i appreciate it

[Willard Wells]

A very well tuned piece of work. Nice flow and content. Most all of us have that one lovee that slipped away and you may have many more. A new exciting experience to learn of your new love.

[Not here]

thank you willard :) im glad you enjoyed reading

[Amy R]

loving the rhyme and word scheme,
also shows how love can sometimes be hard-
great write.
i loved ur piece David!!
thanks for sharing :)

[Not here]

thank you amy :) thanks for ur review

[Amy R]

ur welcome David!! (:

[Brittany Bostic]

Beautiful work. This is a really intense and honest account of a broken heart that you wish so much to put back together. All along you know the only person that can do that is currently unwilling. Loved the rhyme scheme used as well.

[Not here]

thnks brittany :) glad u liked it

[Moonlight]

I can totally feel the heartbreak of the narrator here Dante. Awesome work as usual. :)

[Not here]

thanks moonlight :) i really appreciate all of your reviews

[Moonlight]

You're welcome :)