Think Again

A Poem by Leigha

LOVE gone wrong

Last night was the best thing that has ever happened to you.

You were with the guy of your dreams.

Nothing really went on between the two of you, other than the exchange of a few kisses.

He tells you how he could never get by without you.

The next day you walk in to school and he doesnt even give you a second glance.

A few days go by and he comes up and talks to you again.

You ask him what happened.

He just changes the subject.

The next thing you know he asks you out.

You cant resist his beautiful blue eyes, so you say yes.

What where you thinking?

You guys last a few weeks and there is never a moment that goes by that you arent thinking about him.

Your mother says that she doesnt want you with him because he is to old for you.

You dont let that stop you though.

You go throughout life hiding things and keeping them all locked up inside.

It doesnt bother you but it really bothers him.

He says that he loves you and will learn to get used to it, if thats what it takes.

Wow thats a big sigh of relief!

You last another couple of days and then he decides that he cant take it anymore.

Can you blame him for wanting something more?

After all he is 18.

You are only apart for a few hours and then he decides that he made a stupid mistake and he wants you back.

Once again you fall in to those gorgous blue eyes, and you say yes.

This time things last a little longer.

Everyday he tells you how much he cares about you, and how he never wants to do what he did again.

When he makes you mad you just remind him about him breaking up with you, and he feels bad.

Everythings going as good as to be expected.

He is going to church with you on Wednesdays!

You are more in love with him than ever.

He decides that he doesnt think that it is going to work out because of your mom.

So you guys break up once again.

A week or two goes by and you ignore him completly because you are extemley hurt.

You over hear some of his friends talking about Jason's new girlfriend. Your heart falls to the ground being bombarded by people passing in the hallway.

You finally talk to him again and you fall in to his beautiful blue eyes, and you cant help but kiss him.

You ask him who his new girlfriend is......he doesnt have one. He broke up with her because he couldnt stand the thought of being without you. This was a girl that all the guys wanted to be with. So why did he choose you?

Within an hour of you talking to him again, you are already wanting him back bad.

This time though you take things really slow.

But finally he asks you out again.

Yes of course!

Everything is perfect again.

He promises that he will never break up with you again because of your mom.

You arent really sure wether to believe him or not, so you dont really put yourself out there again.

This time you kind of stay back and stay prepared to be heart broken once more.

............It doesnt happen.

You wait and you wait for there to be a sign that he is going to break it off, but it doesnt happen.

Your on the phone with him one night and and you ask him if he is happy being with you.

He says "Of course baby! Why wouldnt I be?"

Your response is...... Well im not really sure that this is going to work out between us.

He just sits there in silence...

Finally he says "Leigha please dont break up with me.

I know that i have made that mistake too many times and i know that i hurt you but please baby, i love you.

Please think about this before you do this. You mean everything to me."

You respond

"We both know that this isn't going to work out. So why are we doing this to ourselves. We have given this try after try, we both know know that its not going to work out. It would be different if my mom just excepted us being together. But unfortunalty she doesnt, and no matter how much i love you i cant go on doing things behind my mothers back."

He says to you "Well Leigha...... Its your call. I cant make the decision for you. No matter how much I love you and want us to be together im not in control here."

You end up breaking it off after all that you have been through with him.

He continues coming to your track meets and everything else that you are in.

You fall even more in love with him everytime that you see him.

You guys dont go out again but you remain good friends and still exchange kisses.

He just doesnt realize how much that hurts you.

He says that you are a tease but your really not.

Why go on like this when you could be together?

As much as you both want to be together you dont give in.

As much as it hurts you, you decide that it is best if you just dont talk anymore.

So that you dont get hurt.

He finds that to mean that you have already moved on.

You try telling him but he doesnt understand.

He says that he loves you and will wait as long a it takes.

Three days later you get on your myspace, and over look Jason's default picture. Its of him and some other girl. They look so happy, just like you and him used to.

Do you have the right to be angry?

Should you be jealous?

Should it hurt so bad that you cry yourself to sleep for the next three weeks?