The Watch

This is just a very short story. On the Final Draft software it came up to just 1 page. But that's all it took to explain the story, let me know what you people think.

An alarm clock has went off, causing me to wake up from my deep sleep. The black watch still sticks to my wrist. It is not some ordinary watch you get from the jewellers, it is a watch which counts down rather than counts time. On the face of my watch it reads “05:10” and i guess that means i should quickly do the things i want to do.

     “This is the day.” I thought to myself. 

     And as i quickly run out of his bedroom door, i leave it wide open and then as i bail down his stairs and out of the front door i see something.

     In the street, a lot of people are gathered around the body of an old man that has just collapsed on the side path of the road. He too has a watch the same as mine on his wrist however his watch reads “00:00”. 

     I ignore this, I knows what has happened and he continue to sprint down the street and towards a small diner on the side of a busy motorway. As I enter the diner, a woman dressed in a waitress uniform stares at me and then stares at my watch. Tears form in her eyes and she walks over to me. 

     “Is it time?” She asks, trying to hold back her emotions. 

     I nod, then show her my watch which is now on “4:26”. She holds my hands, hugs me tight but i back away, too upset to talk and i run out of the diner door. 

     Outside of the diner, another person walks past with the same watch on. They are crying and running around, all panicking. 

     A car swerves into the car park of the diner, exactly where i am stood but just misses me. Lucky break, huh? A woman gets out of the car. 

     “James, what does your watch say?” The strange voice says. 

     I show her. Her face turns whiter than sheep wool and she begins to cry. She hugs me, tighter then even tighter and lets go. 

     The woman rolls up her sleeve, revealing a very similar black watch. Hers reads “262950:35”. 

My watch now reads “00:25”. 

     The waitress from the diner comes outside and walks up to me, the woman from the car holds me and people begin to surround me. 

     “We will all stay with you. We are not going anywhere.” The waitress explains. 

     A black figure has just appeared in front of me. He is old and dressed in a black suit. He has just put his hand out. 

     “It is time. Come with me.” The figures says. 

The figure places his hand on my head. It is cold and it feels like all my emotions and happiness has gone from my  body. And then i take one last look of my watch. It now reads “00:01”. 

     Everything goes black. 

     My name is James Scott. I had a curse, i knew when i was going to die. So did some others. My name is James Scott and i am dead.

Reviews

[C.C. Marx]

really interesting, I really like this short story

[Amandaaa Caroline (:]

I love this.. It would definitely be crazy though if we knew how much time we had left before we die.. Of course then people may not waste their time with unimportant things, or things that they shouldn't be doing, because they would actually understand how short life is.. Well this definitely made me think about things, great write!

[jlhaessly]

It reminds me of that movie that came out not too long ago. Interesting premise. Can you just imagine if we really knew how much time we had left?

[DrD]

While I respect JiDonnelly's admission of reviewing only poetry, I am an author many leagues before I am a poet. For that reason I want to mention the Twilight Zone theme of this writing because it was first done there. Nonetheless, you presented it well even though I was asking why he just didn't take off his watch. There could be some philosophical points in doing or not doing that. Even so, I liked your work.

[JiDonnelly]

I only read and review poetry sweetheart.
Apologies, But my feedback would be feeble.

GoodLuck & My moral support is with you still!!
Again, Apologies for any disappointment:/

-JiDonnelly'