Only Subdued

I can feel my mind go back to that time
to a place of darkness and pain.

I close my eyes and my head makes a thud
as it hits the wall behind.

To a place of madness and terror,
where my dreams were laid to waste.

It started slow and then progressed,
I had no one to blame but me.

I went looking for something to numb my pain.
I looked to create my own reality.

The right idea, but the wrong path.
For truly, it was an artificial scene.

It played tricks on my mind
that I was in control and

that may have been worst of all.
So, I fed, this monster inside.

Fed the demon, so it grew.
Grew to proportions, that I could no longer satisfy it,

But only make it subdued.

Reviews

[Ballpark Frank]

Well I can relate. I was in that situation that was out of control. Nothing I could do. I felt like I was aboard a runaway train that was without brakes. If I stayed in the situation I would crash hard.. ..but if I jumped out of that situation I would face disaster just as bad....so I stayed in and crashed very hard. Not a good time.

[Rob Santana]

Chandlerl how are you? "the right idea, but the wrong path" sounds exactly what I have done through my life. Strong honest words, I like how this person owns up to their mistakes, taking full responsibilty for their own actions.