Suffocating

What do you want from me? 

I don't get it. 

You can't possible expect us. 

To split up because you aren't happy. 

I know it's mean. 

But I'm not going to let you. 

Get in the way of my finally being happy and safe. 

It's taken me years to get here. 

And there is no damn way. 

I'm letting anyone ruin that. 

But don't act like I don't care. 

Like I don't feel shame. 

Because I do. 

I still have a f*****g heart. 

I'm just living for myself. 

Not everyone else. 

Author's Note

I'm sorry... But I just can't deal with this...

Reviews

[yash]

This is the same breakup s**t, but i must say it's quite straightforward, it's good though. I think in the line line,"You can't possible expect us", it should have been,"You can't possibly expect us" - grammatically.

[Kitten]

Thank you.

[Gage]

No. She doesn't expect you to break up. She doesn't want to have to see it so blatantly obvious in front of her. She doesn't want to feel like she's expected to be happy for you two or fangirl over you two. And she feels like if you cared then surely you would have said something by now, which neither of you have. I had to come over here to get anything at all...

[Kitten]

I haven't said anything because I don't know what to say. And I don't expect anything out of her. And I'm not just going to act like me and Nesh aren't together when she's around. We have both waited years for this. I'm sorry that we hold hands and kiss each other on the cheek like normal couples do with their friends. I'm sorry. But she does me and her did the same right?

[Gage]

That's different. The whole situation is different especially considering that Nesh already knew she still likes you.

[Kitten]

I knew she still likes me. I'm not dumb. But I just don't view her in that way. I'm sorry.

[Gage]

That's not the point either, she let you go because she knew that herself.

[Kitten]

Then I guess I'm just blind. Because I'm not getting it.

[Gage]

There's this unwritten rule of you don't date your friend's exes unless they're consulted first. No you're not her property and yes you can make your own choices but it's more about courtesy.

[Kitten]

Well. I know it probably makes me sound s****y. But I've never followed that "unwritten rule:"

[Gage]

It wasn't your job to follow it.

[Kitten]

Then I don't know what more she wants from me.

[Gage]

Currently she doesn't want to feel attacked for being hurt and told her feelings don't matter for one.

[Kitten]

I'm not attacking her. And I never said her feelings don't matter.