Lasting flavor

Please suggest a better title! Thank you little boy. This story is possible through your love. I hope you like it!

Lasting flavor

 

“Letting go doesn’t mean giving up, but rather accepting that there are things that cannot be.”  ~Anon

 

Beautiful? Yes, it was undeniably beautiful. Lush emerald leaves rustled in a playfully warm wind, bathed in golden afternoon light. The blades of grass reached high towards the clear sky still far beyond its reach. Small flowers dotted the plain of grass, adding flavor and color to the green. Birds of all species trilled merrily in their many tongues. The empty Saturday park was full of music, life and pure joy.

But Candra didn’t have eyes for the shining spring glory around her. Beneath a tall oak tree, she sat alone, shadows trickled through the long black hair that tumbled over her shoulders and down her back. Her long legs were tightly curled against her chest, suffocating her already tight heart. Deep gray eyes were overflowing with the endless stream of tears as they fixed on a photograph. Aeron’s dark face gazed at something outside of the walls of the photo, handsome features forever frozen in the snapshot.

 

            Up until today, they had been dating for a year. She loved him deeply and lived for his every breath. Gradually, she sensed his heart slipping away from her, but refused to believe the warning signs that her worried friends pointed out. Yesterday, she found him kissing another girl. She didn’t feel her feet running away, only the tears that obscured her vision, but sharpened that image that was burned into her memory.

            Today, she confronted him, desperately hoping that it was just a dream, a hallucination that her mind created. Not even a sliver of guilt was detectable in the striking features of his face. He leaned against the wall, leaving a large abyss between them, but she then knew the true distance between them was much wider. His dark red-tinted eyes were blazing quietly with annoyance.

            “Let’s just get this over with,” he said, with disdain in his voice. “Just so you know, I never liked you. I just dated you for your pretty face and that coolness that I now know is just a front. Behind that mask, you are just like any other girl.”

            Her voice failed her as his words worked their magic on him. Somehow, she was able to ask where his heart was.

He just laughed. “Heart? That’s just a delusion that girls create for themselves. Everything in this world is empty and there is no such thing as love. If you’re done, I’m going after Lamia. If there was love, it’d belong to her.” He glared strongly at her. “I never want to see your face ever again. We’re over.”

 

            As much as she wanted to forget him, she just couldn’t bring herself to. She buried her head into her arms, long hair shielding her from the world. Her silent cries were pained and the anguish made her entire body quake. Nothing was right, nothing was kind, and nothing was with her in her darkest hour. Aeron’s photo fell unnoticed through her numb fingers onto the grass.

Suddenly, something warm curled around her head. Her body jolted up instinctively. Her eyes met the dark chocolate ones of a small boy. He had tousled black hair and russet skin. He had an expression of pure innocence and a smile was plastered on his chubby features as he wrapped his pudgy arms around her.

“You sadda?” he bubbled, cocking his head to the side. Without waiting for a response, he took a step forward on tiny feet and submerged his face into her long waves of black hair. She could feel him breathing deeply as if she was an especially fragrant flower, and was fleetingly thankful for her earlier shower. He was barely taller than her when she was sitting down in the grass, and, with arms that barely made it around her head, it made her acutely aware of how delicate he was.

In the face of such innocence, Candra momentarily forgot her sadness. After a moment, she relaxed and curled her arms around his small waist, tightly but ever so tenderly. She smiled as much as her lips would allow and basked in the warmth of such unconditional love and unrestrained acceptance. Where did such warmth and love come from such a tiny body? Her nose pressed against the skin of his neck and he smelled faintly of milk and something sweet. She didn’t notice the tears slip from her closed eyes and he made no motion that he felt it.

“Jacob!” the abrupt voice caused Candra to let the boy, Jacob, go instantly. Jacob, on the other hand, perked his ears up and greeted at the newcomer, loosening his grip enough for it to loop around Candra’s neck, bubbling happily.

From the other side of the meadow, a young woman in her late twenties came jogging up to the pair. Her stride was unexpectedly graceful for someone of her stature. As she got closer, Candra could see that, even though she wore simple clothes, she was quite pretty. Her short copper hair swayed easily with every step.

“I’m so sorry,” she said, gasping a little. She flashed a small smile. “He loves girls with long hair.”

Candra hastily wiped away her tears with one hand. She tried a grin in return. “Really?” Jacob continued to smell her hair, oblivious to the others.

The woman nodded. “I used to have long hair you see…” She gestured to her short hair. She glanced to the side with an expression of memory. “After my husband left me, I cut my hair in hopes of forgetting him.” Turning back, her smile became sad. “You know, his first compliment to me was that I had beautiful hair…”

When the woman quieted down, Jacob let go and started playing with a strand of Candra’s hair. She absentmindedly held him closer, remembering Aeron. What was his first compliment? It had been such a long time ago that she couldn’t remember. A gust of wind brought her out of her musings.

“How old is he?” she asked.

“He’ll be three in a month,” the copper-haired woman replied.

Candra’s small smile touched her gray eyes. “I have a younger brother. I remember when he was that small. He used to cry all the time though. Got me into all sorts of trouble…”

The woman chuckled indulgently. Their entwined laughs sounded easy and unrestrained to Candra’s ears. Jacob glanced from his mother to Candra, confused and not wanting to miss out on the joke. Then as the sweet sound faded out, silence settled in between them again.

Candra couldn’t remember the last time she felt so at peace with another person. The pain of her relationship with Aeron slowly, but surely affected her interactions with everyone else until she realized how far away she pushed her loved ones in hopes of winning Aeron’s heart.

But something was unconsciously emitted from this woman that made her troubles trivial. Candra guessed it to be a mix of motherly warmth and something unidentifiable at the moment. She glanced briefly at her. Yes, there were the lines of sadness. This woman, though in true years was not much older than her, was ages wiser than her. It radiated from the power of her gaze.

Candra felt suddenly self-conscious. This woman must think I’m such a child, she thought bitterly.

“Sorry for bothering you,” the woman said quietly, breaking into her thoughts. Her tone was kind and sympathetic.

Candra wiped away tears that she didn’t realize were flowing. “No, it’s fine,” she said. Her voice cracked unnaturally. “Just some stupid teen stuff.”

The woman’s expression became deep empathy. Candra could feel her heart reaching towards the warmth released by the older woman. “I wish I could cry as easily as you…” she murmured.

Before Candra could say anything in return, Jacob broke away from her and paddled to his mother, his eyes widening. A few tears slid gently down her smooth cheeks. From her surprised and slightly embarrassed expression, Candra knew she wasn’t the only one who didn’t notice.

“Ish Mama sadda?” he demanded, his pudgy hands reaching up towards her face. She responded to his request and bent down, allowing him to examine her. “Why Mama cry?”

“I don’t know, Jacob,” she said, scooping him into her arms. He hugged her around the neck and went quiet.

Candra couldn’t help a small grin from touching the corners of her lips. She rose and stood an arm length away from the pair. She petted his hair tenderly and the woman, peeking over her son’s shoulder, smiled.

“You know,” Candra said after an unhurried moment. “Just before your son came, I was just thinking about the million different reasons why men were the worst creatures that ever walked this earth.”

The woman chuckled humorlessly. “They can be pretty horrible,” she agreed, hefting Jacob higher onto her shoulder.

Candra didn’t respond immediately. “But we are dual existences,” Candra finally continued. “We can’t live without the other. To say that all men are horrible is to say that all women are weak. Some are, but most of us aren’t…it wouldn’t be fair to those who aren’t horrible or weak…” she went quiet briefly then asked, “may I hold him?”

“He’s a little heavy…” the woman started as she handed the little boy over. Jacob, happy to see long hair again, started teasing it again. As the three stood together, the silence that grew older hovered lazily between and around them.

Candra broke the delicate silence first. “But, it’s truly a miracle how men and woman can join together,” she continued, gray eyes rippling deep emotions in their smoky depths. “And create something so precious such as this.” She nuzzled Jacob who cooed gleefully. His pudgy hands squeezed around her neck.

Before the older woman reply, her phone rang, a small merry tone. With a slightly embarrassed grin, she flipped open the phone and pressed it against her ear.

“Hello?”

Whoever was on the other side was a dear person to her for a serene smile drew her rosy lips up. It was natural gesture and it was the first true smile Candra had seen on her face. With afternoon light, the effect was enthralling. Her short copper hair danced around her face as she was wrapped by a celestial glow. Candra knew that any man would fall for such a smile.

I wonder if I could smile like that someday, she wondered to herself. So proudly and beautifully… It was as if the sun himself showered his golden blessings upon her.

The woman snapped her phone shut and turned back to Candra. “I’m so sorry, I have to go. I’m meeting someone here.”

Candra, feeling a little playful, winked at her. “They must be someone special.”

The woman’s smile widened and she nodded. She suddenly reminded Candra of when she was first introduced to Aeron. At the time, he was her friend’s boyfriend and her friend, a normally straight-faced girl, had an almost mischievous expression on her face. She felt a similar aura released from the woman.

Candra knelt down to Jacob’s level, gray eyes meeting chocolate. He tilted his head to the side and smiled innocently. For a moment, she stroked his smooth cheek, hungry eyes traveling over every detail of his pure face as if she was trying to memorize it. He purred quietly and hugged her hand. Somehow he sensed the good-bye and was giving his farewell.

Suddenly, he tottered over and hugged her again around the neck, smelling her hair one last time. Candra returned the embrace, not squeezing enough to hurt him, but enough to convey her feelings. After a long unhurried moment, she let go and gazed into the deep depths of his eyes. He, like his mother, seemed to be wiser than his few years.

“Jacob,” Candra said, her voice cracking a little. “Thank you…I’m so blessed to have met you. I’m sure you’ll grow into an amazing man because you” she glanced up at his mother “have a caring and wise mother. Grow up strong and be proud of yourself.” She leaned up and kissed his forehead.

Jacob nodded to Candra and trotted back his mother’s side. Candra wanted to keep him at her side forever, but, even if it was a few minutes, her life had been touched. Such a miracle…such a blessing…

At the same moment, Candra glanced up and her gray eyes met deep gray ones. The woman pushed a strand of wayward copper hair behind her ear. Clearing her throat, she offered a hand. “Well, it was nice"”

Candra’s feet just moved on their own. Her arms had a purpose of their own, unbeknownst to her mind, and, before thoughts could register, they curled gently around the older woman’s shoulders. Candra felt muscles stiffen instinctively. “Thank you…” her voice said and lips formed.

As her words nestled around and between them, Candra felt every muscle that was stretched taut unravel and loosen. Then strong arms wrapped around her waist. The woman held her close, like the caring mother she was, embracing her as if Candra was her own. Rain in Candra’s eyes threatened to fall, but she bit her lip, shutting them back inside of her heart.

The woman sensed Candra’s restraint. “Don’t be afraid to cry,” she whispered, running her warm hands up her back comfortingly. Candra shivered involuntarily. “Like the summer storm…this too will pass…”

Suppressed tears salvaged themselves from the depths of Candra’s heart and flooded her senses, wiping away all else. Without a further thought, she buried her nose in the fields of sweet-scented copper grass, tears falling like perpetual rain.

“Thank you…” Candra barely managed to choke out, receiving an unseen smile and a tighter embrace in return. For the first time in a long time, Candra felt full release. Her heart was full despite the tears and her mind seemed to cleanse itself. She was reborn because her life had been touched.

When Candra loosened her arms some moments afterwards, she gazed deeply into the seemingly endless depths of the older woman’s eyes, still holding her hand. “Thank you for what you’ve done for me. I’ll always treasure these moments. And may we be wiser in our choice of men,” she said.

A light squeeze and a nod. Candra briefly watched Jacob giggle while the grass blades kissed his bare feet. His tiny shoes lay not far away. She couldn’t help a chuckle. So that was the mischief he was up to, she thought, remembering the silence earlier. For a moment, only his clear laugh could be heard. Even the surrounding birds hidden behind the arms of trees went quiet.

She closed her eyes and listened, breathing in the wind. Past the whistle of the wind, the distant car horns from the road unseen, the rustle of leaves, her heart beat surely. To love again? Most definitely.

Each passing heartbeat made it harder for Candra to say good-bye. So, without another look behind, she strode away, long black hair rippling behind her. To her, letting go of Jacob and his mother was harder than saying good-bye to Aeron because, somewhere in their soothing presence, she unconsciously forgot all about him.

With every step she took away from them, the beauty around her that she had been blind to only minutes ago spread their wings of magnificence and left a feather on her. A gradual, but true smile dripped and painted her lips, glowing with the thousands of colors of happiness and hope. Life took on a new flavor. Slightly bitter yet tantalizingly sweet.

~~~~~~~~~

Time slowed as the older woman behind watched her go. Invisible vines curled around her ankles and bound her to her spot. Her heart and coffee-colored eyes followed after the intriguing girl that she wished to know more about. Her mind, slightly numb, trotted lazily with thoughts. A nimble wind teased her hair.

She didn’t hear the footsteps until they stopped. “Venera?” At the sound of her name, she snapped out of her musings and turned to see her fiancé, David, beside her, chestnut eyes bright and black hair tousled.

A smile that she couldn’t hold back even if she wanted to appeared on her face like gray clouds from the moon. David noticed and was warmed by the tenderness that crept into her voice. “Hey there.”

Smiling, he leaned down his tall height and kissed her on the forehead. His lips lingered there for a moment, savoring the sensation. Then, slightly reluctantly, he stepped back. He gestured towards the girl’s retreating figure that was shrinking in the distance. “Who was she? Someone you know?”

Before Venera could answer, Jacob discovered something on the ground. “Mama!” he exclaimed, tugging at her pant leg and flaunting his finding.

While her fingers wrapped themselves around the edges of the glossy photo, she gazed upon the handsome face trapped inside the frozen picture. But there was something malevolent about the way his dark red-tinted eyes glinted. She shivered a little involuntarily. Then her mind flashed a picture. It was beside that girl when Jacob was hugging her…

Throwing her head up, she knew that, if she called then, the girl might hear. As she took a step forward, she opened her mouth to form the name. But she stopped.

“What’s wrong?” David asked after a moment, a slight worry entering his voice as he gazed upon her face.

“I…never asked her name…” she murmured, more to herself than to him. Her coffee-colored eyes followed the girl’s figure. The girl paused a moment, as if she was listening to something. Then she glanced over her shoulder and Venera could see a determined smile on her pretty features. Yes, she thought with a grin, that smile just belonged there.

She glanced down at the photo. “May we be wiser in our choice of men” she had said…then it finally made sense. Her heart had been broken too. It explained everything.

“Hm…” David started. Venera glanced up at him. His expression was thoughtful and slightly amused. “She has a beautiful smile. I think any guy would fall for it.”

Venera nodded. I wonder if I could smile like that someday, she thought. To let go of the past and move on…

“You know,” Venera said quietly. “She said that I touched her life. But I think she was the one who touched my life.” She closed her eyes and took his hand. “Thanks to her, I think…I think I can leave Scott behind, at long last.”

He smiled and squeezed her hand. Then he saw the photo still in her grasp. “Is it hers?” she nodded. “I could run up and give it to her…”

“No,” Venera broke in, shaking her head. Her hand rested on his arm. When a smile painted her lips with serene and wise strokes, David suddenly remembered all his reasons for falling for her. Venera looked up and saw long raven-hair disappear into the distance as open and endless as the future. “I don’t think she needs it anymore…”

 

“Some think it's holding on that makes one strong; sometimes it's letting go.”

~ Sylvia Robinson

 

 

Author's Note

This story has true origins. On Feb. 14th (Valentine's day and Chinese New Year), a small boy surprised me while I was reading at a bookstore. He was so cute that I just HAD to write about him. Though I wasn't hurt like Candra, I want to tell that boy for making my day and the many afterwards.
Any suggestion s?

Reviews

[Hisou_Tenshi]

It's such a cute story. You describe the boy so wonderfully that I too, feel like I was hugged by such a boy. He seems like he'd be very cute. Maybe I need a hug like that.

[Larry Dyson]

imagery is wonderful...I would like the progression of the story if it were a bit more random...Meaning...the meeting of the boy is very soon...developing the Candra character more fully would be nice...I reads wonderfully as it is ..but the character deserves more space and time....tell Me more about the inner workings of her emotions...maybe compare the boy to the crassness of the boyfriend and his lack of love and emotion? very nice story

[Maram157]

I very much enjoyed it. You really do have a talent in writing

[Levioshock]

Fantastic!