A quick write up

Hope you like it :)

Remember the words? All of them, like entire worlds. Remember the days? The lazy, morning "hey's" Remember the first time? The sweet wine. Intoxicating, intense feeling, All the wounds, healing. Maybe another day, Another way... And I'm all over in this world. What I gave you, All i ever gave you, Came from my burning heart. What's it worth? I don't know, Maybe the price is low. But, do read my words below. I love you.

Author's Note

Reviews

[Aeolian]

Glad I stumbled upon this, short and sweet but really lovely.

I love Poems that evoke a sense of thoughtfulness with their timing and rhythm. It doesn't feel like the writer is writing to a metronome. It feels like... well thoughts really. Which I think works really well for the subject matter, it's not thick and weepy and overdramatic. It's a quiet simple thought, love, longing, regret?

My only suggestion in really more of a personal one. I like the way it ends with the I love you, I think it's sort of final and quiet and sincere. But it makes me wish it had just a bit more impact. I think removing the other mention of love, "We call it love. It flies like a dove." would give the final line more of a.. emotional gut punch? The line isn't necessarily bad, but it's a very common comparison without much emotional impact here. I think it's omission would do more for the poem than keeping it in.

Just my two cents on that, either way I love the poem.

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Now that was constructive! thank you very much! :)

[Aeolian]

Hah, thanks I try.

[Dani The Unreviewed]

correction applied, it's looking much better. :)

[Aeolian]

Oh wow, I'm surprised you agreed. Glad I could help. :3

[Dani The Unreviewed]

i never turn down good advice :)

[closed]

now you write to immortalize...

not death

but the thing you wanted all along

love...

you write not on the wings of the death angel...
but upon the reigns of the cherubim of elixir...

of life



-Dream

[Dani The Unreviewed]

yuppies...lol.

[Ghazal]

lovely......................

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Thanks.... :) ... :)

[Shah Sabia]

"Maybe the price is low, but do read my words below
ILoveYou"
Good part, rather the attractive one :)
Mesemerizing poem.
Added to my favourites.

[Silvernitrate]

Enthralling, definitely. I admire the simplicity of it.

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Thanks ......

[Max]

Simple, yet extremely valuable. I loved every single line in it, I could even feel the love, which was used to create this masterpiece. It is not made of words, it is made of feelings. I can only thank you, for sharing.

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Thank you :)

[Max]

You are welcome :-D

[Zapster]

Love your images to express your love to the love of your life. Goodluck!

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Thank you very much. :)

[A writer]

Wow. Shorter than usual, but it certainly kicks like the rest. Absolutely gorgeous. I think, the meaning is obvious to anyone. You're in love. A hundred pointer.

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Thank you.

[A writer]

You are always welcome :)