Whats wrong?

Its personal...

His eyes showing pain,
Make the blue sky rain.
His voice showing some fear...
What's wrong my dear?
I wanted to ask, but a tear
Came along,
its heavy because of fear.
We were sitting in silence,
Waiting for guidance,
But it was only
Lonely
Silence...

Author's Note

Personal stuff...

Reviews

[Carrie.]

I like parts of it. There are grammar issues, but they're small and easily fixed. The biggest thing I would take a look at is lines 5 and 6. They need to be reworked, they throw off the flow of the piece.

It is a great start.

[Dani The Unreviewed]

Thank you. I'll edit it as soon as i can.