Prologue - Defiance

An old man struggles to get a desperate message to the only people who might be able to do something about it. Will he finish his task, or be caught in the act?

Bagrinus hastily scrawled his desperate message, the old man’s trembling hands ill-suited to the task. The tiny bit of parchment gave scant room for anything lengthy, and the letters were hardly recognizable as such. He ground what few teeth he had left, flexing the frail muscles in his writing hand in an attempt to ease some of the shaking. It was no use - the scribbled missive would have to do.

The old lumancer hunched over in his plain wooden chair, trembling as he rolled the small scrap of paper into a cylinder no wider than his little finger. His heart raced as he shakily lifted one of several burning candles from his desk, their light scarcely enough to pierce the night air in the small study. Red wax sloshed over the edge of the candle, pooling on his hand where it quickly hardened against his skin.

Bagrinus took deliberate breaths in a vain attempt to calm his nerves. If he could just get the letter to Eradyl, it should be enough. His faith in Da’Noth’Tira had waned over the years, but even they would not ignore a threat of this magnitude.

He turned in his chair, bending low as he laid the candle on the ground. The wire bird cage sat against the stone wall of the study, home to a solitary carrier pigeon. He grabbed hold of the cage, frantically fumbling with the rusty latch. He struggled desperately, wriggling the small pin this way and that.

Finally, the latch squeezed its way free of the small slot, the cage door springing open as it did.

Bagrinus looked on in horror as the white pigeon dove for the opening. The bird was his only hope, a symbol of all that remained in a lifetime of empty deeds.

Without thought, the lumancer shot his arm forward, calling upon every bit of strength left in his tired bones. His joints were wracked with pain as arthritic fingers closed around the bird’s small form. Relief washed over him as he pulled the creature to his chest.

He took a small leather tube from a tray atop the cage, a bit of chord dangling from a loop at its center. He fumbled about as he struggled to tie the chord to the bird’s leg.

With a sigh of relief, the old man cinched the knot tight. He stood and moved toward the study’s single window.

Bagrinus raised the bird aloft, preparing to release it into the air when the creature’s small form suddenly erupted in a violent blast of pressure, taking his right hand with it. He knelt in shock for several moments, watching as a cloud of red-stained feathers rained down around him, floating gently toward the stone floor where they landed in an already mounting pool of blood.

Pain flooded his vision, the throbbing in his arm mounting as blood poured from the space where his hand had been only a moment before. He gasped for breath, trying desperately to slow the rhythm of his pounding heart.

Clenching the stump of his arm with his good hand, the old lumancer turned to the door to find a familiar figure looking back at him. “I know what you’re thinking, Bagrinus. I can see the question there, lurking behind those sad eyes of yours.” The blond-haired intruder smiled, his expression mocking. “You always were inquisitive. Allow me to satisfy your unspoken query. No, I did not have to do that. Oh, but it was such a delight, wouldn’t you agree?” The man’s smile grew into a toothy grin, the dim candle light reflected in his emerald eyes.

The pain continued to throb in waves with every beat of the old man’s heart, but it hardly mattered now. Bagrinus had failed. His entire life had led him to this one moment and he had failed.

He supposed there was only one thing left to do. If he couldn’t put a stop to the madness, the least he could do was wipe the smile off the b*****d’s face.

Without waiting for an invitation, the old man clambered to his feet. He called out as he had so many thousands of times before, the excruciating pain in his arm forgotten as he began to gather every shred of power he could muster. Even in his prime, Bagrinus would have hardly stood a chance against one who was bonded, and there was no question how this particular contest would turn out. Nevertheless, he was hardly about to submit without a fight.

Before Bagrinus had completed the gathering, his blond opponent stretched his arms out before him, his silky red tunic shimmering in the candlelight. “Now you die, old man.”

With that, the air began to crackle, alive with energy. It swarmed about both men, as they stood facing one another from opposite ends of the study. He found it strangely comforting to know that he would meet his end in the place he had called home for the better part of his life.

Bagrinus took a deep breath, raising himself up to his full height. He set his legs apart at shoulder width to steady himself as he continued to drink in the ancient power. The lumos burned like red hot fire in his veins as it consumed him, hammering his senses, physically rocking him back on his heels. He had to have more.

The wily old lumancer flared his nostrils, biting down hard as he willed more and more energy into his being, the agony of the gathering quickly outpacing the pain in his arm. He drank it in like a fine Vetrian vintage, bathing himself in Azjran’s wrath until he thought he would burst from within.

The old man grinned, baring his only three visible teeth. “Come on, you b*****d!” He yelled as loud as he could manage, his voice barely audible over the crackling and rumbling of the energy gathering about the pair. “That is, if you even remember how it’s done!” Bagrinus loosed a mad cackle, releasing every spark of energy he had managed to muster. With a deafening boom, the small study erupted in a brilliant flash of white light.

As quickly as it had come, the light blinked out, and Bagrinus was hurled into the wall behind him. There was a definite crunching sound as pain flooded his body. He was held fast to the wall for several seconds, before falling to the cold stone floor in a heap.

His opponent took slow, deliberate steps toward him, his grin alight with menacing mirth. “Impressive, for one so feeble.” His grin grew wider. “I shall…” The smile disappeared from the man’s face as he looked down to find a trickle of blood splattering onto the back of his hand in fat droplets.

The desk had been obliterated in the blast, and it appeared that some bit of shrapnel had made it through the man’s transmutation, slicing through his cheek like butter. The wound was deep; he would need an Abator.

Bagrinus smiled, his amusement unwavering as his opponent's cries of anger reached a crescendo, unfailing as the man planted a foot hard on his collar bone, steady as the darkness overtook him.

Author's Note

I wanted Bagrinus to feel desperate without boring the reader with excessive detail about the letter and the bird. Does it work, alright?

Reviews

[Patrick Jinks]

Hi, first and foremost I really enjoyed this chapter- very engaging. Already curious as to what the letter holds and at what stage of the story this will be discovered in.

The bit about the letter and desperation does work well, although I think it was overdone a little- once the reader is told Bagrinus is 'shaking with fear' they will not forget and it does not have to be reiterated in every action he does.

Maybe use the word released instead of loosed regarding Bagrinus and the energy?

The blonde fellow reminds me a little of the shade from Eragon, as 'bonded', a being of higher skill and possibly magical standing than ordinary folk.

On the whole, though, a solid, gripping opening chapter which makes me want to read on.

[Jared Grace]

Nicely, done. You're able to engage the reader without them feeling alienated even though they have no idea of how this fantasy world works. I hope we will get more information on that in the next chapters.
Descriptions were detailed and precise too.

[Yaseen J Malik]

nicely done! this prologue really sets the tone for the rest of the novel to follow. i like how urgent each movement he made was. the urgency is necessary and is going to shift directly into the next chapter! on to the next one!

[Tsukin Archangel]

*Golden Review* HAAAAAAA!!!! *heavenly light shines from the heavens

Well this went nicely with the "Monster Attack" OST from the movie King of Thorn.
Anyway onto the actual you know REVIEW part of this.
I do believe you properly gave that sense of desperation considering I found myself tensing until the last moment where this Bagrinus died (I'm assuming). My right eye even watered a little at the poor feeble old mans attempts at trying to get whatever his message was across to these other people. I think it's a great prologue, and I definitely want to know more about these bonded and the lumos. It seems like an interesting take on magic, if that's indeed what it is. In any case this is definitely a great start. I was able to picture it all quite well. Not in the least boring. GOOD JOB!

[raerae]

Definitely comes across as desperate and definitely not boring, very good and leaves the reader asking questions. Great.