shake...

my face hurts...

so, i took off early today mostly because i couldn't take anymore. the constant running in circles, loud crashes and hollers from across the room, the demanding people, the inconsiderate others, blah blah blah. you get the point. crappy day. the weather looks ominous, which makes me happy. there is nothing more cleansing to my soul than a really deep thunderstorm...wish there was somewhere i could go to sit on a covered porch and just watch it pass by. i need a break from life. i need to get away from it all for a few days, but i lack the adequate fundage to do so. not that it matters...i couldn't get the time off from work anyway.
so, i'll sit here and throw myself a pity party, all by my lonesome, trapped in my own personal hell waiting for the walls to come crumbling down on my face. i just wish i could shake the bluish-blahs---instead i sit here dreaming of opiates and alcohol to mend the cracks, wishing i had someone to talk to, staring at the clock--hoping that the time takes its sweet time getting here in bringing home a swarm of more craziness and unnecessary loudness....
   

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[Jane Olivia Davis]

not really a poem...more like a stream of bitching run-on thought---from feb 2009