an offering

i wanted to give you something of me

but all i have are bleeding lips, bruised knees,

poached butterfly wings, bitten nails,

clocks with broken hands

ignorant to time,

pale flesh smeared with 

sadness stains, a bed of rotting

petaled bones

and a terribly mangled heart. 

 

i am not beautiful, but i am real.

please don’t try to fix me up. 

Reviews

[Traci]

The raw emotion and imagery portrayed in this well written piece is truly impressive. The line "I am not beautiful, but I am real" sums up the premise of this poem. Staying genuine and true to one's self is the true beauty in individuality and when we tend to give too much, we lose a piece of ourselves that is not so easy to get back. Stay honest because you my friend are simply amazing!!!

[Dana Alsamsam]

thank you so much :) your kind words mean a lot to me!

[The Chosen Poet]

The raw emotion on this piece :( Brilliant read Dana. ''i am not beautiful, but i am real.'' staying genuine helps even the strangers define you just all, this is well penned. Amazing

Sean

[jacob erin-cilberto]

should be "are"

but wow, yes, i love this...what you see is what you get...it hasn't been an easy road for me until you...

but now that you do have me..take me as is...don't try to fix me.
I've had enough of people trying to make me into what i am not.

jacob

[Dana Alsamsam]

after going back and forth between are and is fifty times, i changed it to are haha thank you! you hit it right on the head, thank you for your kind words :)

[K. Louis]

angst.

The grammarian in me wonders about the use of 'is' in the second line...
is lips singular or are lips plural? hmm..

I always like the symbol of clocks...and 'petaled bones' I like that.

[Dana Alsamsam]

i ended up changing it to are after going back and forth a million times. haha thank you for your kind words i know it's angsty :(