A Missing Piece

I wrote this from the perspective of my aunt after losing her son, my cousin.

I know that some days  I will wake up

And regret everything I hadn’t gotten

A chance to do for you,  

My first child.

You’ve gone too soon, and with you

I’ve gone, to a land of unrequited emptiness.

I will question the sanctity of destiny.

On these days I will brew my coffee strong,

And rub my eyes

Longing for some semblance of you.

I will search for it in your closet.

Clothes still hang in a hopeless

Menagerie, like skinned animals at a butcher,

But your scent will be gone

Along with my sanity.

Or maybe in the shallows of my mind

I’ll find you with the crumbs on the counter,

On the empty white walls that fixate me,

In the unread pages of your novels on the table,

In the naive eyes of your younger brothers,

Or in the purple bags circling my own.

These days will be lead heavily,

Like rusty anchors attached to my chest.

The loss takes the form of bile

In the back of my throat: dry and sour.

The acid springs leaks in my body,

Snaps the strings that hold my flesh

To my bones, to my organs.

As I remember words you spoke to me,

An eighteen year old son to his mother,

A year ago today, the day of the fatal crash.

Reviews

[Leica]

i am a mother and do think i would be struck mute if one of my children passed away..
you wrote this with grace and tenderness yet the raw blade of grief is ever present..
my condolences to your aunt (and the family) for a loss way too soon..
nicely penned Dana!

[Dana Alsamsam]

thank you for your understanding! it means a lot especially because you're a mother yourself, and i do hope this poem accurately echoes that motherly sentiment. thanks for reading!

[Glen Yumang Manese]

I believe words come freely... when the actions are for someone we've lost... only in the grievance of these lines echo a life once very much alive... You've woven a sentiment for your aunt and cousin... Thanks for sharing... your thoughts...

[Dana Alsamsam]

i hope i accurately reflected this pain! thank you so much for your kind, understanding words and for reading.

[zainul]

This is a great effort that transmits the perspective of your aunt after losing her son.

[Patrick O'Neil]

Wow, this was so good, so well written, and great use of words.