Entry 1: 6/12/18

Entry 1: June 12, 2018

I worry about her daily, though she tell me not to, I cant help it. I can see it in her eyes no matter how well she's able to hide it..I'll always know. She's tired.. She carries so much on her shoulders that it acts as wings of stone to a bird ready to take flight. The pain from it all, that she feels, weighing her her down like a ball and chain were cuffed around her ankle. Keeping her captive from the joy she wishes she could feel. Others grow blind to the kind smile she gives them, however, I see right through it. It was the same smile I had been giving people for years when they'd ask if I were okay and it'd only made me worry more. Though we didn't share the same path, I knew exactly how she felt. I try to make sure she know's that I'm there for her by any means possible, yet she never comes..She dosent want any of us to worry about her and claims she's alright but, she's drowing in everything that's slowing her down. Preasured by all the stress and it tears at her...and seeing it tears at me..knowing she's miles away and I cant physically do anything to help aid her.

I pray the day will come where she no longer has to worry about a thing. That she'll be happy and the false smile that she bore in front of everyone became genuine and permanent, forever writting across her face. No stress to weigh her down, nothing in her way to slow her. I pray that her life becomes easier to handle both for her and her little girl, along with the one yet to come. 

      

  - J.Sinclair