The Truth Behind Romantic Love

I sang soft lullabies when I was child. I like seeing the blue sky on sunny days, I was completely free. My heart and my mind were taken by no one. It was a blissful time in my life. Later, I had a cr

I sang soft lullabies when I was child. I liked seeing the blue sky on sunny days, I was completely free. My heart and my mind were taken by no one. It was a blissful time in my life.

Later, I had a crush when I was sixteen years old, then I experienced my own love story. I fell in love with someone, then I suffered because my desire was just a hope and not yet a reality. I changed that magic equation by living my love life based on love.


I was in a science class, my teacher asked us to discuss a new experiment that we had done. At recess, a female classmate stood up beside me. She was attractive. She had the fairest complexion I had ever seen, curly blonde hair, large green eyes; pretty smile…Her face was in front of my face, we looked into each other's eyes. Then I felt a weird feeling run through my body. It was the first time her smile had aroused me. I fell in love. Suddenly, the bell rang.


Some days later, she asked me about to give more explanation of the practical lesson we had had. She knew that I loved talking in detail about that. I did it but time past much faster than normal. We had a great time with each other.

I liked being alone with her all day and seeing her pretty smile and large green eyes. My behavior changed from nerd to stud. I put on my best clothes and I shaved too.


Every time I spoke, I hoped she was watching me. I liked hearing her voice and seeing her smile which made my world brighter and wonderful.


On another great day, at break time, we enjoyed speaking together. It was the first time she had shown her feelings by telling me she liked me from the core of her heart in the midst of all this I felt the same feelings and I spoke the same words. I knew she didn't want to let go. Neither did I.


The days roll into one day, and months roll into each other. My dream was how I could have my loving person beside me for the rest of my life. However I had no money, no degree, no job….



Four years later, I went to college where she studied. She knew that I had to struggle many years to have my degree from the university. Maybe, she had fallen in love with another person. I didn't know. Maybe she was looking for wealthy person. I didn't know. Maybe she didn't like making anyone suffer for her. I didn't know. Maybe she was not ready to wait many years until my graduation. I didn't know.


"You have to focus on your studies. Don't think of me. Your priority is your future. Put me out of your mind," she said.


I had a shock, my throat got dry. I started to stammer. I got numb. Then, there was silence. A deadly silence that made me feel worse than getting yelled at. I became speechless and I was looking into her eyes in order to memorize her eyes as much as possible. She looked at the sky as if she were asking for compassion. She certainly understood that it was my last visit to her. I grasped her hand, my smile was confused. Finally, I said good bye.


Later, I focused on my studies. I ended up seeking her out in different places. Moreover, I never cared about other girls' hearts that wanted to attract me, anymore. Feeling ready for love and being ready for love were two completely different things and that became the toughest feeling on the Earth; if I couldn't hold her in my arms.


My desire became as strong as the longing. I tried to forget her but my imagination was more powerful than me. Sometimes I saw her in my dreams, apologizing. At night, in the darkness tears trickled down from my eyes….


As the poet Terence said, "The less my hope, the hotter my love."

My thoughts were greater than the space or the distance between us. My thoughts to her became like an obsession. They stayed in my mind all time. My imagination brought her beside me. No matter our distance. No matter our space. As a matter of fact, I was still mesmerized by her smile and her voice.

As Proust said "mystery is not about traveling to new places, but it's about looking with new eyes".

One day I met her friend. She told me that my beloved had married. I was so disappointed. My dream had definitely disappeared.


I asked a psychologist about romantic love, for these thoughts which persistently camped out in my mind. I sought to get them out from my brain. However, this feeling filled my brain with happiness every day. I didn't know why!


"Could you tell me how can I stamp out these feelings of romantic love from my brain?"

"You have to focus on its advantages. I have done thorough research about romantic love, and I am surprised. More than 95% have the same crush experience at some point in their lifetime. Whether they have been rejected by someone or they have dumped somebody who really loved them.

Romantic love is a mystery. It's embedded in the core of our brain. It's more active than taking cocaine. It's an obsession in permanence.

Faulkner once said, "The past is not dead, it's not even the past".

Romantic love is a perfect addiction when it's going well.

Romantic love is the most powerful sensation on Earth because we can take enormous risks to get life's greatest prizes.


Romantic love gives us the willingness to create our novelty, identity, so we have romantic writers, romantic poets, romantic singers, romantic actors….

Romantic love gives us the power to choose adventure, danger, travel, exploration, discovery instead of security and safety, so we have athletes, soldiers, tourists, scientists, active actors in actions movies….


Romantic love gives us selfishness instead of selflessness, autonomy instead of togetherness, so we have different companies, different jobs, different points of view ….

Romantic love is the most powerful feeling experienced by people on this earth. Love at first sight, which lasts just some seconds, creates a longing within us.


Romantic love teaches us to live in love with our perfect partner and avoid any separation by focusing on just the positive thoughts more than the negative. So like an equation, mathematically we are living to love each other.

The sweetest thing about romantic love is not living with your crush and living out your desires but its living without them. We seek to live our lives rooted in desire and longing but this way has no future.

Everyone at some point has a great feeling for one person rather than another. A crush on one person rather than another. A desire for one person rather than another. Thank God for these feelings that He has given us.

There is only one God that has given us the most beautiful feeling on earth in order to have one some idea about His love. His love for us starts when we are born. The relationship between mother and baby, between human beings and nature, animals, universe….

In fact romantic love is given to us as part of a test. The longing we feel for that other someone should be translated by us into the longing we need to feel to see God in heaven.

Only the best ones will achieve that goal but the desire; the feeling of desire to see our One God and no other is manifested somehow in this gift of romantic love, desire and longing given to us by God, Himself.
The greatest party of all time is this event. Foregone conclusion.

The gist of our short journey in life is just living in a real urge, in a real longing, in a real passion, in a real loving, in a real desire, awe in all to see the loving God. "




©2015 Dakir Abderrahmane

Reviews

[Confuser]

Mr. Abderrahmane: The story is absolutely brilliant. I truly did not wish it to end. I found myself swept away with the beautiful imagery, oddly, I was transported back in time, giggling at your words as if I was a young school girl. The audience for this story is very broad. This composition has universal appeal for all, and I hope many people will read it for it not only is it lovely and heartwarming, it is filled with much wisdom. I found myself laughing loudly when I read: from nerd to stud, visualizing, my son, my husband, actually anyone, like I was watching a movie. The descriptions are so inviting, delightful and perfected, I could not pull myself away. I sigh with happiness as I read the days roll into one day. You are so talented! Such a beautiful composition. The narrator's honesty revealing the young man's vulnerability, by the repeating phases of "I didn't know," worked very well. You made me realize, in my subconscious, the desire we all have for love, for it to be forever, to find that one person, as they say soulmate; I was hoping for her to wait, and then the departure, his sadness, but never missing a step his journey continues, and a plethora of such beautiful lines, I was so captivated, every synapse and nerve ending of my cerebral cortex, was intrigued with the brilliant wisdom within the magnificent writing. The visuals is entertaining, and the willingness to provide a glimpse into the psyche of a young man, and give such a fantastic explanation, for which I believe, and hold close to my heart is remarkable. Sorry, I was taking notes, but I write this from my heart. I wish to thank you for the opportunity to read this gorgeous piece of art. I am still smiling. Thank you so very much. Dale

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you Dale for reading. Your comment means a lot for me. I'm so glad to find someone who read with her heart like you. I'm so grateful for your wonderful comment. Thank you very much.

[Confuser]

Mr. Abderrahmane: It truly is my pleasure! When I see an email from you, I am so happy, excited to get to your words. What a legacy dear sir. All the people you give happiness to. You were born to write. I love your compositions. Please have a good weekend, and THANK YOU SIR!! Dale

[Michael G. Smith]

That romantic love you write about here is called fantasy. It's more than a drug it's a poison that can kill our spirit if we let it. I've experienced this daily fantasizing about past loves to the point of suffering. It's wasn't until i recognized it such as you had that i was able to actively rid from my life and when i did i was able to find real love. This is a good story but need editing.

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you for reading.

[prachi prangya agasti]

This is a beautiful write with wonderful lessons. i admire it deeply.

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you so much.

[Nicole (Carpe Diem)]

the story is fabulous. I think there are a few places where things could be re-worded to sound a bit better and have a smoother flow but overall very well done

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you for reading.

[Deepak Sharma]

Sir
one of d best thng i have read so far.pen portrait was beautiful..i req u to make me ur disiple

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you so much. http://www.amazon.com/gp/aw/s/ref=mh_9590304011_is_s_tools?ie=UTF8&n=9590304011&k=Abderrahmane+dakir

[Jennie Baron]

I so agree with you. In love we perceive God; it's how He reveals Himself to us, whether it be romantic love or any of the kinds of love we mention. I wish there were more than just one word in English for love; the Greeks had the right idea in having different words for different kinds of love.

Again, great writing. I'm impressed by the number of quotes you have at your disposal to illustrate your points. As Dale said, many thanks!

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you so much.

[Kshitij Srivastava]

Absolutely loved the imagery....i was pulled into it even before i realized. Thanks for sharing : )

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you Kshitij Srivastava for reading.

[Kshitij Srivastava]

My pleasure :)

[Coyote Poetry]

Wow. A amazing story of love. The quotes and thoughts were amazing.
"Romantic love is a mystery. It's embedded in the core of our brain. It's more active than taking cocaine. It's an obsession in permanence"
You brought the reader in and left them with a many things to think about. A powerful write and a worthwhile read.
Coyote

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you Coyote for reading. Your comment means a lot for me. Thank you very much.

[Coyote Poetry]

You are welcome.

[beach0324]

it is a wonderful and powerful story of love , a lot of us go through this with we want what we cant have and then when we have it and its great we miss it so much and we don't think that we can ever have that feeling again with anyone . I like the I don't know like you were un sure of how things would go and how she would feel or what story she wanted this is so true of real love many times we Don't know really what the other person desires are .you also expressed many thoughts that were in your mind your emotion drew me in to reads it not letting me glance away or be distracted thank you so much for your wonderful story Rita

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you Rita for reading. Your comment gives a joy to my heart. Thank you so much.

[beach0324]

yes well everyone has had someone that they have loved to the core of their being and as people miss an opportunity for a great relationship because sometimes were young and don't give someone a chance when it could have been great p.s. talking about myself when I was young :)

[Rudi J.P. Lejaeghere]

Good romantic story about love. :) Rudi

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you so much Rudi for reading.