Mother's Hope

I tried to add more about what mother"s need.

I was married in my 20s, I was eager to have a baby. I came from a big family, we were five sisters so I decided early with my husband Nour to start a family.

Two months later, I was pregnant. I was very careful , I would not hurt my baby so I ate healthy food, slept well,  smiled, made myself happy by reading jokes in magazines, breathed deeply fresh air in the park, left a smoky places. I was proud of my baby. Once I saw him, my eyes lit up. It was love at first sight. I was head over heels in love with him. I was nuts about him. It was an amazing time. I’m crazy about him. We called him Rabia.

During one year I breastfed my son Rabai. I didn’t sleep well anymore. I thought about him every day. I asked myself, “ Did he eat well?, Did he sleep well?,  was he Ok?.” When he laughed I laughed too, when he cried I cried too. When he fell sick I fell sick too.

The years have gone by fast ,  Rabia reached the age of six. We registered him in the best school. I devoted my life to raising him, I drew pictures with him, played with him, cooked the best food for him, read children’s stories with him, watched children’s TV program with him, bought clothes and shoes for him, reminded him  to do his homework and brush his teeth before going to bed at eight o’clock in the evening, guided him through this life on a good path, gave him advice, gave him a crash courses in life subjects, told him to keep his chin up, paid him a compliment, made time for him, worked my tail off to save money for him, prayed for him, made many sacrifices for him.

The years went past, After, Rabia graduated, he found a job in a short time. He became smarter, stronger, more handsome , more knowledgeable, more confident. He got some experience under his belt. I could count on him. I had waited patiently for this moment.

I told myself, ” I seemed to done my job well, Right now, Rabia is able to follow the rest of his journey in a safe way. It’s time to take a rest for a while.”


As soon as he started to work, he fell in love with a girl called Nora. they could not buy an apartment so we offered for to live with us.

Later, Rabia and Nora immigrated to Canada then they immersed themselves in work. They worked as heavy as the heavy rain in Canada. Over the years their heart became as hard as the rocks.

I whispered to myself, “ I’m like a tree in my country, it takes me years to grow and give  fruits before exporting them to another country, where all things can be bought even my dearest son, Rabia. He grew inside me for nine months,  I owned his soul and his body. He was in good hands, I took care of him for thirty years, I was his first friend, I dedicated all my life to making him happy, he had enjoyed with my delicious home cooked, he had enjoyed my company. I had covered him with my blanket in the  cold. I had done  my best.
Right now, I’m useless to him, he left me, stabbed me in the back, left me with my loneliness. My education was a real flop, my dream was disappeared, I felt down in the dumps. I live with it. I’m as that tree which lost fruits and its roots dried, they expected me to die.” The tears fell down my cheeks.

 

 

Later, my husband Nour died. I buried with him all my happy memories. It was no laughing matter. I have nothing to live for. I have lost the nearest person to me and all loving things in my life. My life is empty and soulless. I have nothing to live for. I want to die too.

For God’s sake, One hope that I have to achieve before that time  is to see my son, my heart, my life, Rabia, beside me, speak with him, listen his voice, talk together about his childhood, touch his hands, kiss him on his head, hug him so tightly, as much as I can then I would the happiest Mother in the world.

©2015 Dakir Abderrahmane

Author's Note

For your comment, I 'll feel well....

Reviews

[Helen Crutchett]

A beautiful write indeed. The empathy you have shown with a man's view on what a Mother might feel in these circumstances is remarkable.

I enjoyed this story......sadly this a situation that happens many times in a Mother and Father's life. You wake up one day and the children you loved cared for with your heart and soul have disappeared or are absent from your life due to many circumstances.

Well done....thanks for sending my way.

Kind regards

Helena :)

P.S. Thought I would put this comment where it should have gone the first time!! :)

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you Helena for reading. I enjoyed your comment.

[Dhaye]

This is so sad. I feel bad about the truth that children has to leave their parents one day and live their own lives.
Many can relate to this story. Well-written. Keep up the good work.

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you Dhaye, Your comment mean a lot for me.

[Kelsey Ann]

I liked it! It lt is a simple yet powerful story. Good job! :) (sorry for the late review, I'm back in school).

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you Kelsey Ann for your great comment.

[Rewel Acosta Rivera]

Excellent writer and perfect style. I notice that use the Spanish word "rabia"for the boy. You have a excellent talent , keep writing and publish on book print, will be a good best seller. If possible so on English and Spanish. I will be following your stories. Thanks for share your talent.

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank your Rewel Acosta Rivera very much for these wonderful words . You encourage me to keep up writing better.

[Ohhhwillow]

This is a lovely, personal write with good variation in sentence structure. Good work :)

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you Willow for you nice words.

[Fabiola Mahout]

The theme of the story is absolutely heartbreaking, it's incredible to hear the mom's side of how she gave it all for her boy and how he abandons her as soon as he can almost. The language sounds very colloquial. Would a mother with an agonising heart use those words? I feel like the way the mother expresses herself doesn't have a clear order. "Less is more", so it's redundant to repeat the same concept. I feel that, instead of allowing her thoughts to settle and then concentrating them into the essence- maybe a sentence or two, the mother throws out phrases, entire paragraphs, hoping that the sum of them will describe what she feels, but this disorder hurts the aesthetics of the prose. I understand that she is depressed and desperate to regain the love she has lost, but that's the great thing about writing, that one can edit and make it all much more beautiful than what actually happens in life. She really sounds desperate and out of sorts, I'd like to see some serenity behind those emotions. It's all about extracting the essence of feelings and thoughts, and cutting off the fat. Good job on putting yourself in the shoes of your character so well! One can really sense the desperation of her thoughts.

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank your Fabiola Mahout . I learn a lot about your comment.

[Casimir Greenfield]

Beautifully written from a Mother's perspective. I understand the intentions behind your tale, but there were little confusions and the story raced ahead without enough detail to let us understand why the hearts had hardened.

I feel your work would benefit by working with a native English speaker and I imagine that English is not your mother tongue.

I wish you all the best with your writing, Cas

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank your Casimir Greenfield for your wonderful comment. I just edited it by my teacher.

[....................]

This is a sad piece but a reality for many mothers, and parents in general, who have to watch their children go off and live their own lives. I am not a mother, nor am I a parent, so I do not know what it is like to experience this. That being said, I feel a little guilty, for I had great opportunity to be with my parents until their passing. I enjoyed this piece, especially the honesty in the voice. Good job!

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank your FT Ledrew for your wonderful comment.

[dopey]

Quite a common story for a lot of mothers nowadays. However, although I understand how the mother is feeling, I also think that mothers shouldn't feel this way. They should be happy their kids are strong enough to go on without them; you've gotta let them be their own person.

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank you dopey.

[sci-fi-nugget]

I enjoyed the story, that said, the sentence structure seemed somewhat...terse, I guess is the word might be for what I'm thinking but otherwise nicely done.

[Abderrahmane Dakir]

Thank yousci-fi-nugget for your words.