The flame of the moonlight corpse

The one who follows

The devil follows me as i go to sleep the shadows creep weeping in the veil 

blood rains from my skull onto the sheets 

the twisted mangled hands of corpse clutch me as i try to slumber the voices are coming from the walls the millions of monsters underneath the ground the world turns to dark water soulless red and the black eyes in the deep dig into the back of my head the voices swallow one another hungry desperate clinging i feel it on my back the brothers of my sins my blood pact. the stares of a million eyes i am corpse being devoured by worms ,there breath fills my mind i am a burning away an inferno trying burn my soul and feed my dark. the spot in the day ,the vortex in the night retching a scream in my mind unable to let out a sound i turn towards the fallen moonlight and the shade in the corners mangling myself with hatred anger fear devouring all in my path .eating the demons and the sleeping eyes killing the light and reaping the soul that was once mine .daybreak the spot is back and i am a little more touched inside a corpse candle burning at both ends, with the fetid smell of rot from my breath and eyes wide without a loss for sin. the night will come again and the corpse field grows the screaming voices and clamoring hands pull stronger everyday closer to the void waiting for it all to be destroyed only to begin again the black bleeds blotting out the sky and the light of hope that was once again in my eyes is swallowed by my malevolent laughter and the blood dripping from my skull this is not a battle that can be won, the day of end awaits on the new day and i greet it with a smile. everyday teasing me i want to be lost but my corpse flame still burns and a new spark is lit on the ashes of hope and the eyes that once saw are alit anew the fire of the moonlight corpse the burning the burning the yearning for the end the one true end but the night will begin again as it always has and always will...

Reviews

[Ted Kniffen]

There are some brilliant touches in here. Sentiments that cry for a way out, of the darkness. There are a lot of rhymes hidden within this piece. Although written as prose, there is a poem in there.

i am a burning away an inferno trying burn my soul and feed my dark. the spot in the day ,the vortex in the night retching a scream in my mind
consider

I am a burning away
an inferno burning my soul
feeding my dark. the spot in the day ,
night vortex retching a scream in my mind

There is certainly a lot of potential here. I can feel the hurt in the dark.

A good write, Chris.

[TheAimlessWanderer]

Thank you for the read and review and the advice i don't know many grammar rules and yes some of it was just my lack of editing, but if you think it will make it flow better maybe i will try to give it a shot to try to learn some proper grammar again if it will help me in the long run. Glad you could see the potential and feel something from it thank you for reading it. (:

[Sapientiam]

While reading this, I just imagined you running away from these enemies of yours- fear, hate, despair- like one does from a killer. Indeed, these things are killers and they will continuously track you down. The dark imagery swept me into your world, your mind, where every substance of reality is tainted. It's a dark place, but true and almost beautiful. This part really stuck to me:

"the fire of the moonlight corpse the burning the burning the yearning for the end the one true end but the night will begin again as it always has and always will..."

It's like you are waking up from a nightmare and you're realizing that your life will keep going, as will the pain. The word "moonlight" has such benevolent connotations, like love or purity, yet, you are drawing something more darker from this word that brings out the eternity of night to one who endures sorrow day by day. With the companion of fire, it brings out a wrathful, consuming nature to the tone of this, expressing your soul with richness.

You have such a way with words. Great job!

[TheAimlessWanderer]

wow i still can't take compliments crap damn that was beautiful such insight and empathetic connection you seem different did something change ? i hope we can do alright my friend thank you for reading and seeing me

[Sapientiam]

Perhaps something did change... This poem may have been the trigger. XD

No problem!