Incurable Rationale

I dream of a day when I don't have to carry the burden I've bestowed on myself. A day when the force on my shoulders is no longer so severe.

Tired.

Weak.

Lethargic.

I find myself pressing forward, feet encased in concrete blocks, mind edged in a vise, Goliath's foot pressed upon my chest, struggling. Watching my life like a never ending Broadway show, with less theatrics, no direction, and bare of honesty or enjoyment. I see everything, waiting in anticipation for what's to come, excited for a climactic moment that never appears.

In need of change, the villain, a mutilated stranger lurking in the shadows of the moon, it terrifies me, but I keep yearning for it. I crave it. Still, I continue to ostracize for fear of the unknown. Enslaved by depravity, jailed, guarded by my own hypocrisy, I continue to focus on negativity that has scared my thinking.

Rewind.

Play.

Rewind.

Play.

REWIND!

PLAY!

The capability is there to fix demoralizing situation, but I'm too much of a p***y to risk the leap.

"It's too far." I tell myself.

"You'll never make it!"

So I stay. A shell of man who could have anything, but wants for nothing, satisfied with existence.

© 2016 Phillip Francis

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Reviews

Ted Kniffen

Good job, Phillip. A fine commentary on the angst of a modern man. I strive for what I want, not what I need.

Posted 8 Years Ago

8 Years Ago

Hello Ted,

Thank you for taking the time to read my writing and share you thoughts.

jacob erin-cilberto

wow, the jekyl and hyde thing...

that battle within...the struggle against the stranger within who wants to destroy us...

the burden of life can really get to us...we put up a brave fight...for as long as we can...we play the part we are supposed to...but then get the sense we are just acting...and the real "we" wants to come out in the soliloquy...we want do overs...like we were in a bad reading for the role.

j.