Exposure

The decision has been
Finalized--there is no turning back.
My fear, my pride, implored me--
My anger advised me; but
They have all been ignored.
My self disgust screamed loudest,
And my guilt whispered the most
Tragically.
And so I grab hold of the wire,
Coated with thorns and razors,
And pull.
The leaden mass in my chest
Is layered with barbs
All facing the wrong way--I pull.
The points anchor
And separate flesh
From flesh.
I pull.
The tears that fall
Are not from the pain;
They are from the sadness
That I am bringing you.
The serrations mutilate my heart,
But it must be done.
I pull.
I cringe as the bone splits
And the crudely crafted secret
Is exposed.
Blackened, dripping with decay
And loathing, I hold it aloft
From my ruined hands.
I close my eyes--I cannot
Bear to see your face as you behold
My betrayal, my unfaithfulness.
I have destroyed myself--
I pray to God you will not hate me
Half as much as I hate
Myself.

Reviews

[FJ Davis]

If the reader were to take your description literally, there would not be much left of the speaker to forgive.
Someone this hard on himself for an offense committed against a loved one, will, I believe, eventually be forgiven. He'd have to be relieved of such guilt, otherwise he'd likely perish--or, at the very least, purposely waste his life.
Intensely graphic writing created extremely vivid imagery; resulting in unforgettable metaphor.

[Hello, Goodbye]

Love the conclusion.. and I also love it for all the same reasons I loved 'A Collapse'.. However, in this one I specifically enjoyed a well crafted melodic rhythm that serves a potent director.. It flow is engaging in its dark but entirely candid notions.. another great write..