I am Not The Liar

I am not the liar!
When can you trust me?
She is the one, not me!
I don't lie,
I never have,
it is her,
who dares to lie,
right in front of you,
I can't see you to death.

She tried to trap you,
so she can kill you,
out of people's sight,
then she will tell eveeryone,
I did it,
its not fair for me!

The liar is she,
not me,
can't you trust me,
one more time?
She tried to kill you!

~Even you can survive for the first time, it will happens  over and over again

Author's Note

What do you think for this one? I think thats not good, how bout you?

Reviews

[Loner]

Good piece !

[PrincessZeldaWannabe]

I think everyone can relate - there's a lot of anger - but the entertaining kind!

[Kimberly]

I don't know about the last line. I think it feels kind of tacked on and I'd like it more incorporated in the rest of the poem if you know what I mean.

[Coyote Poetry]

It is a emotional roller coaster with your words. Hard to change a view after it is set. Sometime better to allow the person to learn the truth on their own. A very strong ending to a excellent poem.
Coyote

[Short.Nerd]

Nice!

[Sweets]

This is good!
I mean, seriously :)
I think you can easily convince people :)
Great work!

[OT]

this is good!! a very real topic which you've put a nice individual spin on!! well written I thought, I think you could up the flow a little, perhaps by shortening like -I am- to "I'm" - it just gives it a little more speed!! but a nice strong topic, well done!!

[Rasteely]

I think you need to proofread it a little better. "then she will tell everyone"
And in the very last sentence change it to "it will happen over and over again" or to "it happens over and over again."

I like the poem though it's very raw. Like right in the middle of the fight. I kinda even think you should have ended it with the second to last sentence "she tried to kill you!" That's more powerful than the final sentence in my opinion.

[Alicia™]

I think it's very raw, and could do with a little bit of editing, though not too much.

[HopelesslyDevoted]

oh, scary but good write