Wedding Confusion

For Prompt

Looking out the window,
she secretly sighed,
she is the bride,
of tonight,
but why can't she smile?
She whispered to herself,
which I heard right by her side,
'I am not sure if I love him."
I sighed as well,
as I flew to her side.
I whispered
' don't cry, it's ok.'
as the wedding bell rang,
I turned away,
back to the hell,
where I belong

Author's Note

isn't the last sentence weird? I don't know how to end it! Help, please?

Reviews

[Allison]

I really like the concept, or the 'plot' I guess you could say, for this poem. In my opinion, the last sentence is a bit odd. I say this because the poem explains why the bride is having some trouble, but then the last sentence says the second character (the character that says to the bride 'don't cry, it's okay) turns back to his/her own hell. If the bride turned, then it would make sense because she is having this love trouble, but the poem doesn't explain how this second character is also having trouble. i think, if you made the bride turn away instead of this wo/man turning, it might make more sense. or, you could elaborate more why this second character is in her own hell.
Sorry if I seem too technical and/or harsh. I'm actually usually not like this, but I just felt like I had a lot to say this time, haha. Anyways, alter this if you want, but I'm not saying you should or have to. Any way you have it, I believe it is a really beautiful poem, with a tinge of sadness.

-Pokie

[Dalebear]

Good write

[Alicia™]

Hm, I'm not really sure what the story is here, but my interpretation of this is that whoever it is comforting her loves her very much, and that perhaps a part of the bride feels the same way.

[Loner]

leave it as it is !
awesome poem .

[Short.Nerd]

Interesting. good job

[sarah]

this is very interesting

[Drako]

the last line is a little weird? deflects attention away from the bride and makes us question the second character's involvement or feelings. maybe the last line should stick to something about the bride herself and how she's feeling

I agree with Pokie below, its very nice, but the last line is a little confusing in honesty! but a nice write :)

[Calypso]

Nice ending. This is sad and one of my fears. I'm afraid that I won't love the guy I marry.

[Jeff]

I liked the ending. It made me wonder what exactly was going on.

[lady laughter]

here goes nuthing...