The Double Hit

A stressed high schooler cracks.

"Alright class, listen up. I know all of you have been waiting for *forever* for this winter break. It's quite understandable, us teachers are looking forward to this as well, however. That doesn't mean this won't be an opportunity for everyone to quit learning. I'm sorry to say this, but I'm giving out a paper assignment over the winter break." The students in the classroom groan in unison over the news. One kid in particular, Nathan, is bouncing his leg hard. His back is sweating from being nervous, and he can't focus to anything. His attention went from the teacher, to Abigail sitting in the corner playing with her hair,  to Brale in front of him picking on his fingernails.

"The assignment itself is a 500 word essay on how you think you're going to spend your Christmas break, what you actually did, and then if you wanted things to be differently." Nathan didn't pay attention that much, the only part he heard was the 500 pages. This made him roll his eyes out of frustration. He looked over at Abigail once more, and he felt his heart tighten. Abigail turned around, and locked eyes with Nathan. She gave a smile, and a small wave. Nathan turned red, his heart beating faster, and turned to look at the teacher some more. His foot was hurting from all the bouncing he did.

"That's all." The teacher concluded as the bell rang. Everyone gathered their things and filed out the door. Nathan stood up, grabbing his backpack by the strap. As soon as he heaved the backpack up, all of his pencils and books fell out. Turns out Nathan left his zipper open from the beginning of class, and forgot to zip it back up before the end of class. Nathan slowly bent down, knowing full well if he didn't slow himself down, he would act out of rage. But rage wasn't present in Nathan, it was more like annoyance. Utter and complete annoyance.

A few kids snickered at the incident as they left the room, and Nathan's face got even redder. From the embarrassment and the annoyance. He quickly gathered his things, put them in his backpack, and hurried out of the room. He took a quick glance at Abigail before he reached the door, who was just watching him from the corner of her eye. She smiled, then rolled her eyes playfully, suggesting it was no big deal. Nathan chuckled quietly to himself, then left the room entering the hallway packed with kids as far as the eye can see.

Nathan turned left to go to Biology, then quickly turned back around to go right. He forgot something.

"There you are!" Hailey almost yelled out. Nathan, his mood still not affected from earlier, smiled quickly, then returned to his neutral gaze.

"What's wrong?" Hailey asked, knowing Nathan's been off for the past couple days. The past week if she was being honest with herself.

"Nothing," Nathan grunted. Hugging Hailey automatically. Hailey usually loved Nathan's hugs, but lately, they've felt forced. Something was definitely off.

"You know you can talk to me about anything," Hailey said. Nathan gave her a quick peck on the lips, and started to walk away.

"I know," Nathan said as he walked away.

"See you after school?" Hailey asked, but no response was given back.

Hailey stood there in the hallway, staring at Nathan. This upwelling emotion of fear ran through her. What if he was done with her? She shrugged it off, knowing full well that he loved her, and she loved him back. They were going to be together for forever. That's what they promised to each other.

Nathan made his way into his last period class just in time before the bell rang. Math. He loved math. He doesn't know how today's day of class could possibly make him feel worse.

"You look like hell," Tanner commented, smiling. Nathan looked at him, and gave him a half-smile in return. Tanner's smile, dimmed, noticing something off with Nathan. "Hey, are you okay?" 

"Not really," Nathan said, surprising Tanner with an honest answer. Tanner was going to say something else, but then the teacher walked into the classroom.

"Okay class, today we're going to be learning about derivatives, and their applications to physics." Everyone just kept staring at the teacher. No one groaned, but no one clapped their hands out of joy either. People were in this class because they wanted to be, so no one complained about the material they were learning.

"So we're going to start by looking at this position function on the board." The teacher pointed to a parabola on the board with the function "s(t)" on top. "Now you all learned in Physics that this is position. That if the graph was going a certain way in one direction, that can determine the velocity. Well, I have a better way to show you that instead of you memorizing all this. So all you have to do is..."

Nathan loved math to death, but today he wasn't paying his full attention to the teacher. He was thinking about his homework. His feelings for his girlfriend, and for another girl. Whether or not he was going to be yelled at for something else when he got home. Ways not to screw up like he did in the period before.

"...and you take that, and there we go. The acceleration graph is just a straight line." A couple of kids in the class nodded their heads thoughtfully. Regardless, everyone was writing down what the teacher said. Nathan looked around, realizing he was daydreaming on accident. He looked at the board, and saw three graphs with arrows connecting them left to right. The left-most one was a parabola, with the middle graph being a linear line, and then the last graph was just a horizontal line. The teacher didn't bother putting down anything else, like functions. Nathan stared at the board in dismay. What was going on?

He tried looking at his neighbor's work, but even then it didn't make sense. It made the situation more complicated, as he couldn't understand his neighbor's handwriting at all. He quickly got mad that Reggie couldn't have better handwriting. Then he got mad at the teacher for not writing down anything else but the graphs.

Then he thought about the essay he had to write over the break, and he got even angrier from that. To add on to that, the chemistry test is tomorrow, and he hasn't started studying for that yet. There are two pages full of notes he has to get through that he received two weeks ago, why did he wait until the last minute.

"Hey, Nathan," George whispered from behind him. Nathan grunted quietly, signaling what did he want.

"Did you turn in those scholarships that were due today? I turned mine in last period, and wow does it feel like a weight off my shoulders."

"No." Nathan said. George got wide-eyed at the news.

"Nathan! Come on man, you gotta turn those in soon! Do you realize what would happen if you didn't? That's a lot of money you're going to be losing." George warned. Nathan didn't say another word. He just kept his eyes focused forward, his mind racing. He didn't turn in the scholarships because he didn't do the scholarships. He knew he should've, he just didn't.

Now he was more pissed about himself not turning in the scholarships, and at George for reminding him. His heart started to hurt, causing him this pain in his chest. He clutched it tightly, wondering what exactly was going on with him. He needed a break.

The bell rang, dismissing everyone for the day. The whole class got out of the class quickly, including Nathan.

As soon as he stepped out of the classroom, his left ear started to buzz. There was a piercing ringing in his ear, causing him to cover it up. He looked to where the source of loud noise was coming from, and saw a guy with a speaker playing a high-pitched noise. Everyone was plugging their ears, but Nathan's was the only one that physically hurt. The pain in his chest stabbed at him with every intake of breath he took.

Nathan turned around to get away from the noise, but he ended up running into someone.

"Watch it, b***h!" The girl yelled as she gathered her things on the ground. Nathan bent down to attempt to help, but the girl pushed him violently out of the way. Nathan was caught off guard as he crashed to the side, brushing his arm instantly. The guy with the speaker saw the commotion, and laughed loudly.

He turned off the speaker as he yelled, "Nathan just got pushed around by a girl!" Nathan looked up, and saw people standing around him, chuckling lightly at the situation. Nathan's breathing got heavy, but he had to stop himself from the pain in his chest. The ringing in his ear didn't stop, causing his head to twitch a little.

It seemed like everyone in the hallway was now staring at him. He didn't want this. He wanted to get away. There was too many people.

Nathan quickly got up, and shoved his way out of the crowd. He briskly walked to the exit of the school, towards the parking lot where his car was located.

As he stepped outside, Nathan looked over at where his group of friends were located, and saw them laughing at their phones. He decided that he needed to calm down, and go see what they were laughing about.

"Hey, whatcha guys laughing at?" Nathan asked as he approached them. The friends saw Nathan approach them, and they quickly put up their phones.

"Oh, nothing really. Just some memes we found online," One of them said.

"Yeah, it's nothing." Another friend said. Nathan was about to ask to see the memes, but then he noticed two girls snickering out of his peripheral. He looked over, curious, and they too were looking at their phone.

"What is this, some kind of chain text message?" Nathan asked his friends as he looked at the girls. One of the girls looked up to see Nathan, and her eyes went wide.

"That's him!" She exclaimed. The other girl looked up from the phone, and made the same face.

"What..." Nathan said, confused on why she recognized him. He looked around, and noticed a couple of kids staring at him, laughing. Nathan didn't understand what was going on until he felt a vibration in his phone.

It was a text from a random number with a video attachment. Nathan opened it, and saw himself. He got pushed by the girl, and landed on the floor. He lifted his body up with his arms, and his head was slightly twitching. Twitching from the weird ear, but no one knew that.

Nathan looked up from his phone to his friends. They all looked sleepily away.

"You guys thought this was funny?" Nathan asked, anger building up in him. They didn't answer him.

A burst of laughter surrounded Nathan as more and more people got the video. He was stuck. His feet wouldn't move, everyone kept staring at him. Kept laughing. They were pointing and clutching their stomachs. Nathan's hands turned into clenched fists, he felt stupid. He was angry and sad. He wanted to run away and cry. He wanted to punch someone. Anyone, really at this point.

Nathan stormed off to his car in the middle of the parking lot, and got in it. The car itself was steaming hot, and as Nathan reached back for his seatbelt, his elbow touched the metal part, giving him a short burn. Nathan jerked his hand away quickly, but ended up hitting his wheel with his knuckles. He yelped from the pain, grabbing his knuckles tightly. After a few quick, short breaths, he got out his keys. Starting the car, he decided he *really* needed a bath.

He turned on the AC, but it'll take five minutes for it to be cool anyway. Nathan pulled out, driving down the lane towards the exit of the parking lot. It was a clear way out.

Nathan felt anger in him. There was nothing worse that could happen. He floored the gas pedal to try to get out of the area as soon as possible.

He was twenty feet from the exit when a random kid ran out from between two cars. Nathan tried to brake, but he was going too fast.

The car came into contact with the kid, instantly killing him. The dead body flew through the air for a second before tumbling on the ground. Whatever noise there was in the parking lot stopped. Nathan quickly got out of his car, and ran to the student. Someone from the school saw what happened, and screamed, allowing everyone to wonder what happened.

In a matter of seconds, there was a mass of people surrounding Nathan and the dead student.

"You killed Kenny!" A student yelled. There was mass panic amongst the students as if what to do. Teachers were on the outside of the group, trying to get in, but it was hard when a hundred teenagers are going crazy in a tight area.

Nathan stared at the kid, and recognized him as a freshman. A single tear fell from Nathan's eye. It landed on Kenny's cheek, staying there for a second before going down his cheek.

A student picked Nathan up, surprising him. Kenny fell from Nathan's arms as he was lifted up by a big burly man. It was the same guy as the speaker.

"Look what you did!" He yelled. He stood Nathan up, then quickly punched him clear across the face. The crown around them quickly calmed down to watch the fight. Everyone was looking at the two of them with curious eyes.

Nathan fell from the impact of the punch. He was on the ground, clutching the side of his face that was punched. More tears fell from his face as he realized what he had done. He killed someone.

Nathan screamed.

The crowd quickly backed away from Nathan, including the guy who punched him. Nathan's curling scream went to a subdued sobbing that was still loud. Tears were streaming from his face as he sat there thinking to himself.

I killed him.

Oh God, I killed him.

I killed.

What am I going to do?

Where am I going to go?

I feel so bad.

With that thought, Nathan stopped sobbing. His breathing was slow and calm. The crowd around him were confused what was going on. Some of them were leaving, just in case something bad was going to happen to them.

I feel bad...

Except, I don't.

Nathan looked at the dead body, and looked into his heart. He checked into his emotions. There was no sign of sadness. Nor anger. Nathan didn't feel anything.

All of the homework he had, all of the worries and struggles, all of the problems he was facing.

All of it was gone.

Nathan looked up at the crowd around him, and he couldn't help but smiling.

"I killed him," Nathan said, with a hint of amusement. People left the crowd seeing Nathan like this, but a majority stayed. They didn't what to do in this situation. Nathan looked down at Kenny, then back at the crowd.

He chuckled. He chuckled a few times. The chuckling slowly turned into laughter. An innocent laughter that any kid would produce.

"I killed him." Nathan stated. He laughed harder, sending chills down the spines of the students.

"Nathan?" Someone asked. Nathan quickly turned his head to look at the student who addressed him. After he found the student, Nathan's laughter turned hysterical. His face turned red instantly while his whole body was shaking from the laughter.

"I killed him, and I don't feel bad." Nathan said. He laughed even harder, his voice almost breaking from the constant vibration of his adam's apple. His voice seemed really high pitched for someone who didn't hit puberty until that year.

Some of the students were scared of Nathan being like this, but no one did anything. They stood there in shock at what was happening right in front of them.

Tears formed in Nathan's eyes as he kept laughing. His eyes were wide and wild, screening everyone in the crowd as if they were going to be his next target.

Nathan stood up suddenly, wondering why no one was doing anything. Is this really how people act when there's a death? Why isn't anyone doing anything? He should be detained, he knows that, but nothing was happening.

"Why aren't you doing anything?" Nathan yelled. The crowd stayed in their spots, frozen with fear. The shock still hasn't worn off.

"Someone stop me, I'm F*****G CRAZY!" Nathan yelled with anger, then started to laugh again. It was weak laughter, his throat sore from earlier, but it was still eerie. It was visible on his face that the laughing hurt him, but there wasn't a sign of stopping. One kid in the crowd shook his head, and looked at Nathan. He surged forward to tackle him to the ground.

Nathan spotted him from the corner of his eye, and he turned toward the rushing man.

"FINALLY!" Nathan yelled as the guy tackled him. The both landed on the ground hard, causing the crowd to erupt in noise.

Nathan swung hard, and right hooked the guy in the face hard. He landed on the side of Nathan, clutching his face. Nathan quickly crawled on top of him, and started pummeling his face in. As he was doing so, he started to wonder about the people around him.

They were just standing there, cheering on. A few of them were even more shocked at the turn of events, and backed away. The crowd was so thin at this point, the teachers were finally able to move past some of the students guarding in the back.

One burly teacher came forward, and grabbed Nathan around the torso, picking him up with ease. Nathan screamed, kicking his legs wildly, and flailing his arms everywhere. Soon, another teacher broke through, and grabbed his squirming legs. The guy on the ground had his face covered by his hands, blood trickling through the crack of his fingers.

"What's wrong with you, Nathan?" The teacher holding him asked, yelling over Nathan's screaming.

"EVERYTHING!" He yelled. He moved his body up and down in hopes to get out of the teacher's grip, but nothing happened.

Eventually, two more figures, both cops, dispersed the crowd, and detained Nathan properly. They shoved him to the ground, slapped handcuffs on him, and threw him into the back of the police car. The whole time, Nathan alternated from screaming, to a broken laughter, back to screaming his lungs out.

Nathan crawled to the window, and pressed his face against it. Yelling to the crowd of students, teachers, and cops around, "IT FELT GOOD! IT FELT SO GOOD!"

---

A month later, a white car pulled up to the local asylum. Two adults got out of the car to stare at the building. The woman sighed as the man trudged froward to the doors.

Entering the building, they went straight to the kiosk which was occupied by an old lady who was typing away on her computer.

"Hi, we came to see our son, Nathan Jasper. Can we today?" Mrs. Jasper asked. The lady looked at the two, then back to the computer. She typed in a few more letters, and looked from the screen to the parents.

"I'm sorry, he's still unstable."

"Well, can we see the doctor?" Mr. Jasper said. The lady shook her head no as she typed on her computer again. Mrs. Jasper was about to go off when the doctor entered the room.

"Ah, you must be Nathan's parents," the doctor said. The parents looked over, and Mrs. Jasper immediately ran towards him.

"Dr. Hank, why can't we see our son? I want to see him. Please." Mrs. Jasper begged. Dr. Hank looked from Mrs. Jasper, to Mr. Jasper. Mr Jasper's face showed he had the same dedication as his wife.

Dr. Hank sighed before saying, "Okay, fine. I'll show you why you can't see your son." He turned around and walked the same way he came from. Mr. Jasper walked up to his wife, grabbed her hand, then walked into the same hallway.

"He won't be able to recognize you. His brain is at a state where he's not aware of anything around him. The only thing he'll respond to is food and water, and that's only because his body still needs to survive. Other than that, he barely sleeps, and he just sits in the corner muttering to himself."

"What is he saying?" Mrs. Jasper asked. Dr. Hank pursed his lips, deciding whether or not to tell them.

"It'll be better if you heard it for yourself."

They came to the door 823, and Dr. Hank opened it. Mrs. Jasper poked her head in, and saw her boy Nathan huddled up in the corner, staring at the floor, his lips moving rapidly. She could barely hear what he was saying.

"Nathan?" She asked, hoping he would do something. He just stayed crouching there, repeating the same words over and over again.

Mrs. Jasper walked a little closer.

"Darling," Mr. Jasper warned, but she waved him away.

"He's my child, I want to be with him," She said as she inched closer. She could hear the muttering a little better. There was one word she kept hearing.

"...about..."

"Nathan, honey. It's your mom," Mrs. Jasper whispered to him. Nathan remained unmoved, muttering the same words. His eyes never wavered from the spot on the ground. Mrs. Jasper inched even closer, and she could hear what he was muttering.

"I don't want to talk about it."

Nathan's voice was low and harsh, not because he wanted it that way, but because his throat was so sore and broken. The words he kept muttering sounded painful for him to say, but he didn't stop. Not even for a breath.

"During the day he mutters, but at night, he screams. We had to soundproof the walls and door as to not disturb the other patients," Dr. Hank explained to Mr. Jasper.

"Oh, baby," Mrs. Jasper said, hugging her child tightly. Tears formed in her eyes.

"Mrs. Jasper, I wouldn't do that-"

"He's my child, let me be with him," Mrs. Jasper said, sobbing. All the while, Nathan kept staring at the same spot.

"I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to talk about it. I don't want to talk about it."

Author's Note

This is the VERY first draft, will be updating this, probably.