Object

Look look, It's my right hand.

there's this boy I know. Was raised in the same environment as me

We lived by the word , hang out around the curb and do stuff that

at the time was oh so absurd

We would play with pokemon cards and laugh 

now is all about

how many hoes & how many cars, one have.

I mean, I'm only seventeen. I'm not caught up in the street life.

But the boy was on the yellow and ran past that green life.

He wasn't ready

For the "responsibility" a young urban kid has to go through.

After all he's just a kid. Hasn't had the time to let his mind

marinate. But the streets and the beat to his way of thinking 

are linked together as if it was the marriage.

Andddd the Priest for the marriage 

in this instance is the cororner or prosecutor

I just happen to speak my peace. Cause our brotherhood I respect but my honor 

                                      I object... 

Reviews

[Aislinn]

I find that the message that is given here is incredible. There are two teenagers who have grown up in the same place. They were friends at one point, but have fallen into different places later. I love how it emphasizes that not everything is up to childhood misfortune. Neither home situation is mentioned. It's entirely the choices of the two teens. I love this.

[Gleb Zavlanov]

A great poem with incredible and deep meaning to it. Great job!

[TL Boehm]

Wow - the finality of flinging headlong into the street life. This piece is riveting and would be great as a spoken word poem.

[Angel]

The lure of the street...how it calls to young urban kids...but that is nothing new, my friend.
There have always been kids who have been drawn into that call...and I'm afraid there always will be.
That "marriage" is the coroner's meat.
Excellent write, my young friend!!

[dw817]

Now THAT is one game I never figured out, Pokemon Cards or Yu-Gi-Oh. I honestly could not understand it. When I was on Saphris I made all kindsa crazy card games played with a regular deck, Bejeweled Shuffle, Brutal Baseball, Football Fans, Ghost Hunter, Gone Fishing, Goofy Golf, Murder Mysterious, Tricky Tennis, and Wizard's Tower, but my brain was on fire then and it wasn't good.

"He's(She's) just a kid." How many times have I heard this. The catch-all to end all blame and responsibility - sometimes, I think we all wish for that degree of freedom again.

[Ethereal Melody]

It's a good write, though it seems like you've used a few words in the wrong context. Almost like you learned something before English. Tenses mostly. I'm not sure if you meant to do that on purpose or not.
Other than that, the message was wonderful. I love the easy, every day way you speak here so that the common person can understand with perfect clarity. Thanks for sharing.

~ EM

[NA]

Profoundly penned...enjoyed :)

[Kristin Lee]

Deep message but delivered in a very creative way. I like the like about marriage and the coroner. It paints a very vivid and stark image.

[Peter H]

good message and within a moral piece :)(

[Megan]

I really love how real your poems are. How true they are to real people with real lives. Such rough lives kids go through on the streets; I've never lived it. But through your poem I can kind of see what life like it is like. Thanks for the awareness your poetry brings and for the realness it holds :)

[nobody]

"But the boy was on the yellow and ran past that green life" I love this line. The poem strikes me as incredibly sad...the loss of a friend through directions we can't change for them.