her

Wow, I hate this girl

wait, there she go

wait, I think there's hope 

But f**k it, If she doesn't like my personality

she can get my and suck...

"It's 5:26" I replied as she asked for the time

Yeah, back to my first thought

Yeah I lied

Aw man, I love this girl

She passes by and time seems to be referred as jail time

Slow as f**k, But I don't give a f**k

I'm in solitary confinement, but for the rules of love

I'll surely bent

'em for you. I'm all by myself , me and this wall

because your presence never leaves me

even though we're at fall

My head has been abused, so so confused  

 

But when you have feelings for someone

Your thoughts get all mixed 

your brain functions in hardcore

if they was only a switch to have your 

mind and heart living in concord 

her

Reviews

[Rob Funk]

Been there before bro. Great job, keep up the good work.

[Cassie]

Nicely worded and the last stanza speaks it all.

[TL Boehm]

love em hate em love em hate em love em hate em. Yes that is exactly how it goes and sometimes it never settles out

[carol burgess romance]

chuckle I was young once....you got it right

[SteveB]

You took me back a shade over 30 years with this one. The confusion, the mood swings, the total absorbtion. You nailed the feelings.

[AYVID N]

The youthful frenzy of a crush is very well captured here! You could express yourself really well here. Just goes on to show that we have to feel strongly about something before we can write well about it.

[Travis Gibson (poetic h..]

You really captured the choas someone can cause in the head of another. Enjoyed reading this piece.

[Astro]

I can sense the torment. Like the way you describe how time slows down like a prison sentence. Some of the language you employ is a bit odd, but the overall feeling and message is abundantly clear. This line is a bit off grammatically, "I'll surely bent" you could change it to either "I'm surely bent" or better yet, "I'll surely bend" which makes better sense with the preceding line.

[Kristin Lee]

I agree with Annabelle Lee. Those feelings of love and hate walk a fine line sometimes. You've used that rapper style of yours to express that well.

[Annabelle Lee]

Aha. ten bucks says she knows exactly what she's doing.