suspending vivid death........... isn't that like bungie jumping? The thing I like about poetry framed like this is the reader can group his own words together to construct the association or pace of the piece. You've given the reader many choices and all yield an interesting frame to consider. Good job.
Posted 14 Years Ago
1 of 1 people found this review constructive.
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this is a brilliant write, a bit unpolished by the looks of it, but when you read it you recognize it's beauty... every word seemed as if reflected upon... and I especially liked the ending "what makes you smile?" so simple, so genius. :)
i like this, i like how the title doesn't nessecarily give away the whole poem, it had a deeper meaning then one would expect. good work!
Posted 14 Years Ago
If I were as skinny as this poem, I'd be smiling. Especially since it looks like it still has junk in the trunk. I like big butts. They make me smile. ;P
moves really well. you work the words in a trickle sort of way that just keeps the eyes moving. Not to mention that the content is damn good. Stranges images in short pecking burts that burrough into the mind and nest there.
brilliant work man.
cheers!
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