Invisible Pain

Invisible Pain

A Story by crispycream

On the first day back at Mulligan Academy, somebody dropped a piece of paper in my wheels knowingly, of course it gets stuck the wires and takes me ten minutes to get out causing me to be late for class. As I roll through the familiar iron gates there was a sense of crispness to the air. I am wearing my new uniform and it was a tad bit big for me. I had my bald head covered with a baby blue cashmere hat. I go into the school and enter the crowded hallway. I look down at my uniform; a knee length. grey and red plaid pleated skirt, a white long sleeve collared shirt, grey knee socks, mary janes, and a grey v-neck cardigan.

I try to hide myself in the crowd but it is hard to hide yourself when you are forever stuck in a wheelchair. I push my glasses back up to the bridge of my nose, pull my fingerless gloves strap tighter, and roll down the hallway. Everyone in the school remembers what happened but I was trying to do my best to forget.

It was a late April night this spring and my dad had been out drinking and came home massively drunk. I had always warned him that alcohol had a certain power over him that he shouldn’t even think about. It was about two o’clock when he finally came home. My mom thought I was asleep but I was staying up, unable to sleep waiting to give him a piece of my mind. When he finally got home his clothes were ripped and he could barely walk he was so drunk.

I could hear Mom asking him where he was, why he didn’t call, did he sleep with anyone. It was like this a lot lately, them fighting and me pretending I had no idea what was going on. That night something changed, I could hear my mom scream out as he slapped her and anger surged through my veins as I shot out of my room, and stepped in front of her as he went in for the punch. She tried to push me away but I had always been stronger than her.

He glares at me, and he growls at me

“Move or else” I smile in the slightest and say my voice dripping with sarcasm

“Bite me” Sadly I was standing next to the two story high living room window, and he shoved me so hard, I went flying through it before I had the chance to hold onto anything else. It took a minute for me fall unconscious, so I saw my mom run past my dad calling 911, I heard sirens within minutes but I was already half gone, my mom was holding my hand as they pulled up and all she kept repeating was

“She was protecting me, she was protecting me” The police arrest my dad, as they pull me onto a stretcher I let myself go…  

When I wake up, I am in the hospital, connected to a million different wires, my mom is stroking my hand with her thumb. I open my eyes groggily and whisper

“Hi Mommy” Her face shot up, and grins. I turn my head slowly my head cracking a bunch, the flowers had fallen off the trees outside and the sun was shining into the beige hospital room.

“How long was I asleep?” I ask

She smiles sympathetically and says

“Two months sweetie” Her voice cracks on the last word and she starts sobbing and I pull her into me for a hug.

“ I thought you were de- dead” She says struggling to get the last word out between sobs, I hold her into me letting her sob, not caring about the fact that I was the kid and she was the adult because ever since I was little our relationship has been backwards but that was life.

For the next week the doctors preform every test imaginable to see if I'll ever be able to walk, they were all negative, and as each test came back negative I hated my dad that much more. By the time I was let home they had told me I would never walk again.

For the next week they teach me everything about living in a wheelchair from getting dressed to brushing my teeth. My mom had moved into a new house and she told me my room was on the first floor.

© 2015 crispycream


Author's Note

crispycream
I'm not finish but wanted to see what people thought

My Review

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Featured Review

This is really good and I love the story! I'm really into the character already. The transition from present to flashback was really good. The biggest thing I noticed was at times you switched between tenses, from present and to past. A suggestion would be keep it in past tense only for flashbacks if you want? Another way, if you wanted this to be a longer story, would be to slowly reveal what happened. Keep flashbacks constant, but lead up to what actually happens? Otherwise it's great and I'd love to see what other characters would join in on the story and how other classmates might treat her. I hope I helped, even if a little bit!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

crispycream

9 Years Ago

Oh my god! That is an amazing idea! I can't believe I didn't think of that! I'll defiantly keep work.. read more



Reviews

This is really good and I love the story! I'm really into the character already. The transition from present to flashback was really good. The biggest thing I noticed was at times you switched between tenses, from present and to past. A suggestion would be keep it in past tense only for flashbacks if you want? Another way, if you wanted this to be a longer story, would be to slowly reveal what happened. Keep flashbacks constant, but lead up to what actually happens? Otherwise it's great and I'd love to see what other characters would join in on the story and how other classmates might treat her. I hope I helped, even if a little bit!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

crispycream

9 Years Ago

Oh my god! That is an amazing idea! I can't believe I didn't think of that! I'll defiantly keep work.. read more
Oh my gosh! This is sooo good! I want more! Your characterization of the narrator is amazing. The only question I have is in the 4th paragraph is it supposed to be "sleep with anyone" or "everyone" like it's written. Overall this is great!

Posted 9 Years Ago


1 of 1 people found this review constructive.

crispycream

9 Years Ago

Thank you SO MUCH! That means so much! I don't show my writing to anyone so I was a bit nervous to p.. read more

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2 Reviews
Added on June 13, 2015
Last Updated on September 18, 2015

Author

crispycream
crispycream

Dublin, Ireland



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TAYLOR TAYLOR

A Story by crispycream