A Letter

A letter to my past, current, and future self.

To my fearful five year old self…

I know you fear your tipsy mother,

And I know you fear your sister’s hits.

I understand how you search for cover,

From your mother’s yells and sisters fits.

Whenever you’re scared just look to the stars,

And focus on how life will get better.

And whenever that feels impossibly far,

Just think of me writing this letter.

To my angry eight year old self…

Please realize it was never your fault.

You did not drive your mother away.

Don’t pour into your own wounds more salt,

For she herself chose not to stay.

Whenever your bitter just look towards a new day,

And think of how far you’ll go.

There will be people who want to stay,

Even when you push them away they’ll say ‘No.”

To my taciturn ten year old self…

You do not deserve what is happening,

No matter how much you think it’s true.

You have a right to exist like any other being,

There will be people who will truly love you.

Whenever you’re sad just look at the sky,

And know there will be a day you’re glad to be alive.

No matter how much it sounds like a lie,

There will be a time where you will thrive.

To my troubled thirteen year old self…

Please know your death will not cure all,

And your life will not always be filled with sorrow.

Your impact on others has not been small,

And your pain will only be given to others to borrow.

Whenever you question your life just look to the moon,

And remember how important you are.

So when you stop believing in the word “soon”,

Know your happiness isn't all that far.

To my frightened fourteen year old self…

What he did to you was not, nor will it ever be, okay,

But you're not disgusting or vile.

And I know sometimes you wish and pray,

That to you he did not defile.

But when you remember just look to the clouds,

And know that this isn't your definition.

Even when the darkness in your mind may crowd,

This won't forever be your position.

To my current sixteen year old self…

I’m so proud of how far you’ve come,

You've pushed through so many obstacles.

So many hard battles you have won,

And so much more wonderful things are possible.

So whenever you doubt just take a look back,

And be proud of the heights you've climbed.

Since courage you do not lack,

Nor a stubborn will and strong mind.

To my future self…

I know you will have amazing days,

And I think there will be great things you will do,

So now all I have to say is,

I believe in you.

Author's Note

Any and all constructive criticism is encouraged and greatly appreciated. Please note that this poem references my actual life and the situations i've been through.