Prologue

Prologue

Thirty minutes from now

“I’m sorry….you’ve got the wrong person.” I say.

“No, no, I don’t! You’ve got to believe me!” The man, despite how insane he must be, is desperate.

“Listen to me; maybe someday, you’ll find the woman you’re talking about. But believe me, you won’t be finding her here. Goodbye.” With those last words of advice, I shut the door. As I turn away, I hear his fists pounding on the wood, his cries for help, his sobs of defeat. And I know that I will never forget this moment. I will remember that his jeans had a quarter-inch tear on the right knee. I will remember that there were five ice cubes in his lemonade glass, until exactly 2:08, when one of the cubes had completely melted. I will remember the way the man looked at me, believing so much that I was his mother, it was near impossible for me to call him a liar.

I know I would remember every detail of this day. I know because I can never forget anything, least of all my own son.

Reviews

[Meat of Dog]

This is a good start; it feels like one of those plot structures that starts at the end or in the climax action and works backwards. The drop-into-action raises a lot of questions (which is really important in capturing attention). Also, I'm curious if she has a photographic memory due to remembering something as missable as ice cubes melting. There are a lot of good pulls here and I'm interested to see where they go.

[penless writer]

Its awesome. Great hook.
I will read more!!.

I think "when one of the cubes had completely melted" is redundant and it doesn't let the reader have the satisfaction of intellectual challenge.

[Tai Ryens]

Grabbed my attention, makes me want to read a little more

[Rosa Bianco]

Captivating! Completely captivating! It's short, sweet and straight to the point. It grabs hold of the reader (for me) during her thoughts as describes the man and the moment. The ending surely keeps the reader wanting more, ready to turn the page at any moment! Cannot wait to read more,

Rosa

[Q.Kennedy]

Definitely grabs my attention and piques my interest. Great work!

[Calypso0]

Wow, this is definitely a great prologue. It makes me wanna read more, but, I'll have to wait till tomorrow for the next chapters since it's super late. Anyway, you've got my curiosity and the honor to be the first writer to have their books in my library! *wink*

[Waka Crusnik]

Well that definitely stole my attention, which is key for any good prologue. Awesome job... it's just a shame that only the prologue is up; I'm hooked but with no where to turn to, so many questions unanswered!