My Sister

A poem written for my sister for her birthday.

There is this friend I have come to know,
I call her my sister.
When I am with her,
I know that everything will be okay.

Her heart breaks when I am sad.
She is filled with happiness when I am glad.
No matter how far apart we are,
I know that I always have her in my heart.

We have shared many secrets,
There is nothing that is hidden.
I know that no matter what I do,
I will always have someone on my side.

We may not always get to see each other,
But when we do it’s always special.
Because time spent with sisters,
Is time that is never wasted.

God created us to be sisters.
That was His plan from the start.
I feel very blessed to have my sister,
Because I know that I am loved.

Author's Note

This is my first attempt at poetry so constructive criticism is welcomed.

Reviews

[AaronFreitas]

I loved reading this poem as it hit me close to home. My sister is also my best friend, my everything. We dont have secrets we tell each other everything and I know that we have each others back no matter what. I really enjoyed your words :) For me, I would say in my style I rhyme a lot... not sure why I guess I am just comfortable with it. I was reading W R Stowe's review about the last stanza. If it was me I would have went with something like this....

God created us as sisters
That was His plan from the start
I am blessed to have my sister
Nothing can ever tear us apart

Not much difference but like I said I tend to rhyme a lot and I think by saying nothing can ever tear us apart you imply that there is an unbreakable love between sisters. Just a thought :)

I still love it the way it... sometimes... if you read some of my writings I write exactly what I feel and just don't care what anyone else thinks. I know its pure right from my heart and with a topic such as this I make sure I am happy with it and that's what matters :) Sorry for rambling

[Crazycatgirl_10]

Thank you for reading! :) I appreciate it!

[Rachelle]

A sentiment that I wished I had having grown up surrounded by boys. But then, sisterhood can extend beyond the nuclear family and I am grateful for those who have been my soul sisters as I go through life.

[W R Stowe]

God created us to be sisters.
That was His plan from the start.
I feel very blessed to have my sister,
Because I know that I am loved.

I am a stickler at times being old school rhyme and all,poetry need not rhyme but it should be rhythmic and smooth.Your poem had great temple until this last stanza.????God created us as sister's
This was a fabulous plan
I'm very blessed to have her
Because our love is grand.
You can play around with different phrases this was just a probability.
I enjoyed reading it,was very meaningful,just that end kind of threw the rhythm off just a suggestion,I have done it often myself so we are not alone.God bless

[Crazycatgirl_10]

Honestly I'm not much of a poet but I'm extremely close to my sister and she loves reading my work so I wrote her a quick poem. I should of taken more time on it (I wrote it in about ten minutes) so I understand that it's probably not the best poem out there. Thanks for reading. :)

[W R Stowe]

It is always the best to our intended recipient they don't seek out typos or any other flaws.Upon a fresh view "God created us as sisters"Would give the entire piece rhythm. But it doesn't take any of the beauty away from your poem..

[Dreamgirl23732]

The beauty of the poem lay in its simplicity and the fact that it came straight from the heart!

[Daisy]

It's wonderful...... sisters are the one you can't live without that's true

[Crazycatgirl_10]

Thanks for reading!!

[Paper Forks]

Overall tone was good. A thorough rewrite would do wonders to this piece. I liked the simplicity of the language used, but perhaps it's too simple? I may try changing a few words here and there and make the rhythm to flow more evenly.

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

I have a sister we are extremely close, we are also like best friends.
Its great to have such a strong bond with your sister, theirs nothing quite like it.
I don't live with my sister anymore either, its hard on me. Though as you said when you do see eachother its special.
This poem was very heartfelt, deep, meaningful, soulful, and beautiful.
I really enjoyed it.
Cheers to having a Sister :)

[Crazycatgirl_10]

Yes having a sister is awesome. :) thanks for the review :)

[cimmy wuv xxxooo]

your welcome. No worries :)