Chapter 3: Her whole world Blind

the last girl alive isn't alone. Something is hunting her.

Chapter 3: Her whole world Blind

 

Familiar clicks and hisses called out as the crumbled bridge grew silent. March noticed a single Vermin crawl away into a tunnel close by.  Her ribs still ached from the impact, every breathe sharp as a knife as she lifted her body and staggered into the unknown.

 

The walls looked, greyer, rougher and without a drop of water.

 

Bright red lights stung her eyes as she tried to focus on the Vermin in the distance. “I swear you’ll be the first one I’ll break.”

 

March knew that even if she managed to find them, there wouldn’t be any way to cook the meat. One problem at a time, she thought.  The grim resolve took over, the pain spread with each step, she was determined to live. Her pace quickened towards the prey just as a crunch of her rib snapped out of place to pop open her skin. With a scream she fell to the floor and slid around the corner into a blinding white light.

 

The echo of her voice reverberated back 10 fold, set against the thunder of rushing water. March looked up with blurred vision and realised where she rested. It was as though someone had constructed dozens of concrete waterfalls. They stood the size of skyscrapers, above and below, one on top of the other all underground. She often wondered where the power came from, in her eyes the building must have been a sort of dam, simple enough to last the ages.

 

The Vermin scurried upon an open walkway under the waterfall. Once more March walked after it. Every step sliced into her as a trail of blood splashed along the path. The fall of sewage drenched her body, washing into her eyes, she was almost blind. Nothing but shapes and shadows appeared to her on the other side.  

 

“Human…” called a whisper.

 

March froze; it was not a normal voice.

 

“You are the one we wait for.” It sounded like half a man mixed with the screech of the creature that chased her.

 

There was nowhere March could run. She wiped her eyes then regretted ever doing so. Its body was large, furred and savage, wolf like, grey with red beady eyes. And it was standing right in front of her.

 

Those clawed hands grabbed each arm, forcing her to the ground. “You are our way to Paradise.”

 

“And you thought she was a myth,” called a second voice, with the tone of a woman out of view. “Hold it down; our friend will conduct the procedure.”

 

A set of footsteps approached, one soft, the other thick, as though it had some sort of club metal foot. March lay still under the weight as the creature knelt on her arms and wrapped its claws around her head.

 

Panicked gasps and whimpers winced out; desperate questions ran though her mind, why are they doing this and who they are? None of which she felt able to speak. She could only watch and hear as a mechanical whirring noise gained pitch behind her.

 

The creature smiled. Spit dripped from its mouth into March’s face. The sound rattled in her ear.

 

It span in a circle attached to what looked like an arm. Soon it was by her mouth, then her cheek, slowly it stopped at the nose. Then a flash, March knew true pain. They peeled back the skin and plucked each eye away.

 

She almost passed out the moment they finished, yet somehow she was still awake and screaming.

 

“Now the rest?” asked the creature.

 

“No,” said the Woman. “Payment is for the eyes, or do you want to stay here for Reclamation?”

 

“Forgive me Founder.”

 

They left soon after. March slipped into unconsciousness. She never saw the sun, and now she never will.

Author's Note

I always review back! and pride myself on giving real honest feedback about my reading experience :)

I'm trying to improve my own writing, this is another experiment into altering a book I finished a while ago. it was in a different tense and I'm still learning so it's not perfect but I really want your help, be brutal. even if you hate it, please say why? :) thank you

cheers for the honest suggestions from last time for those who reviewed, your awesome, lets keep the ball rolling,

Reviews

[Wayward Soul]

The eyes of march..... I get it now, i have so many questions, so many, what are these creatures, who exactly is march is one that keeps popping up in my mind, your writing has a way of makeing me want more, keep it up.

[M.R Steiner]

All will be revealed in time :)

[RJ Snow]

Is there going to be more? I'm curious to know why March is the way to the creatures' 'Paradise.'

[M.R Steiner]

Aha, I'm well into adapting it from the first version which was first person, the advice I've got so far makes me think it works better in this format, I will try to post it regularly, between this and my other book is how I divide my time most days :)

thank you for getting through it all so fast, that's really awesome of you.

on a good day I can do a chapter or two :)

[RJ Snow]

I understand it takes time :)