In OUR Universe

Try reading just the blue words... see what happens C

I pray tonight to never become immune
to this drug that's left my soul content
for I've found as home a blazing star
where WE is the only resident

No other need could I have but this
for I knew nothing of true desire
before tonight I'd never met the kiss:
salvation riding on one endless breath

In your gaze, your touch, I own the world
within our world, I need nothing more
I've found the place where I belong,
BEING I'd been forever yearning for

This woman never WAS before you... YOU
As the stars high in our universe unfold
within her soul, she knows you see them too
not even the unspoken is unshared here

Dreams are no longer imagined things...
What do I have left for which to pray?
To unutterable questions, there are answers
answers only comprehensible in our sway

Together we dance to the beating drum
lilted by the rhythm of life, by beauty:
the miracles within never exposed to some
choreographed in time with twin heartbeats

Reviews

[An owl on the moon]

There is such a mythic, mysterious quality to your write... blending in the colors and the poem within the poem.... The dreamish flow and form so beautifully express the depth and richness of love that is overwhelming in its wonder. Amazing, elegant piece!

[Lorraine]

What a clever and unique style you've shown in here. The poem itself is elegant and touching as it it. This piece has a very strong appeal along with a smooth flow. Contrary to that, the blue colored words have a cutting appeal. Ideas are randomly thrown and are cut short instantly. Even so, the meaning never eludes the readers.

Keep Writing. ^___^

[Stephen Churchill]

the blue is scattered and connected, somehow. intense stuff.

[Fabian G. Franklin]

I like the way you wove the poem within a poem and the overall flow of the piece. Well done.

[Francez]

Beautiful write! I like the other message intertwined in the poem. Original!

[Deaths Cold Kiss]

this is a beautiful piece, i love it

[G. Marie"floating on an..]

This is just an amazing poem. It is full of emotion and flows beautifully. I didn't get the meaning of the blue writing at first but after reading your note I realized what everyone else was talking about. What a brilliant idea A poem within a poem. I loved this so much I am putting it in my favorites!!!!!!

[PoeT4994]

Yo!!! That was sick!!! Loved it.

[DBURKE]

Oh WOW What a brilliant poem. A poem inside a poem simply brilliant!!! Great poem x2 =)

[The Rock And Roll Cowbo..]

Wow I love the whole poem within a poem, that was truly brilliant... as for the bigger poem I found this quite a testament to love, that first stanza alone was really one that caught my attention... to me that says that we must always work on love and show love to that someone everyday in little ways and not be content with the fact we are with them, a sure way to let love fade. You are a true artist of the heart.