Sun and Moon

 

                   

Sun and Moon




The sun rises in the same way it always has today
The moon is hiding in her invisible cave, waiting
To show us the beauty in a different shade of light

The children speak of sad things with a happy voice,
Their laughter does not know and it reminds
That sometimes we must pretend that our laughter
Does not know what it has known.

Today I will let the sun wash my face clean
Let it enter my laughter and absolve my sin
With its gentle way the sun will be my love
For this one day.

When the sun leaves me
I will look to the moon for explaination
Let it enter my soul and make a home there
With its waxen beauty the moon will be my love
If only for tonight...

Reviews

[Natasha Ashway]

That sometimes we must pretend that our laughter / Does not know what it has known.

One of the things I enjoy about reading poetry is that whenever an insightful line or phrase comes along there is a 'Shh!' that goes off inside me and the words echo louder and longer in my mind as I contemplate their meaning. It's a great buzz, it's what I look for, one high after the other, literature junkie that I am.

And so those words are just deep! And your formatting isn't bad either - nice picture.

Nice work C x

[Clockwork]

I greatly enjoyed this piece. Cosmic love, the ability to smile and allow the forces of the universe to cleanse the body and soul of affliction. There is a great sense of freedom here within your piece. This makes a Sunday morning sparkle.

[Leah Simone]

I like how you mention the happy way bad things are talked about - the laughter - the children - and the resolve to let it go - and start fresh - I think the combination of innocence and deceit was very nicely played in this poem and worked well for you.

*explanation - it is an odd spelling - coming from explain - used to always trip me too

The opening two lines felt off - perhaps - Today, the sun rises as it always has...or the sun rises as it always has, today - without this separation - it seems as if the sun is rising and rising and rising - the same way - today...one day - not multiple days.

The capitalization of every other line - didn't seem to always fit and it threw me off rhythmically at times.
I could find no purpose to having such a form - it confuses things too much.

[Adela Muresan]

The harmony between nature and humanity is gorgeously described, especially when you say that the light cleanses you.

You chose a very good font and picture.

A.M.