Mix the Sea

Racism and prejudices pisses me off. Can we all just PLEASE get along!

 

This is all by grace
Don't waste your face;
Discriminate the race that's so inconceivable,
So rude and unbelievable.
The man with no plan but world domination
Racial discrimination
Lack of comprehension
Excessive degradation
Of the lower classes
The unsold masses;
The untold duo
Trio
Dodecahedro.

The infinite shape of things to come

Holds nothing to the infinite pain

Of a thousand slaves

To the white man,

With no plan,

But world domination

For the sake of segregation.

My personal convictions are in a way without reason,

I see no season wherein every one lies free,

I divulge my secrets for the sake of a better race,

So much hate,

Yet no possibility of love.

For such a big place

It's a small world.

Respect thy brother

For he is thy brother

And forever shall be.

The possibilities are endless,

Our fate is not set in stone,

Behold!

We control all the happiness that is ours for the cherishing.

And respect…

Respect.

Reviews

[Chloe..Across the Unive..]

My personal convictions are in a way without reason,
I see no season wherein every on lies free,
I divulge my secrets for the sake of a better race,
So much hate,
Yet no possibility of love.
For such a big place
It's a small world.
Respect thy brother
For he is thy brother
And forever shall be.
The possibilities are endless,
Our fate is not set in stone,
Behold!
We control all the happiness that is ours for the cherishing.
And respect�


I love this,,I feel all you are saying.. this is the truth and you said it well.. would be good spoken aloud.. very powerful.

Chloe
xoxo

[Natalie C]

Let me start off by saying great title, very fitting to the deeper message of this piece. The subject very controversial and something I sometimes think not talked about enough. I know most of us are aware of the racial situation of the world and sometimes I think that's the way it is going to stay.

There must be a better way that we all can coexist in this world filled with so many different races and cultures and I think it all starts with what you said in the end�
Respect!
Great piece and thank you for submitting!

[L.G. Knight]

Awesome rant! I love it!

My personal convictions are in a way without reason,

I see no season wherein every one lies free,

I divulge my secrets for the sake of a better race,

So much hate,

Yet no possibility of love.

For such a big place

It's a small world.

Respect thy brother

For he is thy brother

And forever shall be.

I love those lines.... I have always had a hear time figuring out how we can all hate eachother so much... people who clame not to be prejudice are putting people down for being what they are and so even if we try we seem to come out just a little short of loving one another...

Respect thy brother
for he is thy brother
and forever shall be....

I can find no better words... We are all brothers and sisters and in any religion or lack there of we find that we have all come from the same place... no many is better than another man because he is lighter or darker of skin no man has more wealth than another because he has more money and no man can ever say that they are more blessed than another man because of background/privelidge... this poem works for so much and I really enjoyed getting the opportunity to read it... thanks so much for entering it in the Let it go poetry contest!

~Frances~

[~crazy Beautiful~]

a valuable lesson to all mankind,
i appreciated your values which reflect quite well through this piece
nice work
Thank you for entering my contest

[Raef C. Boylan]

Yeah, I was in a weird mood. I still stand by what I said re: everyone being responsible.
It's my belief that there are different types of racism - the terrible, violent hate that many people still adhere to...this can be fought against, and although it's horrible, it's almost the better of the types, because the others are subtle divisions that are really hard to combat. Some of it's based on ignorance, which can be educated, but some of it seems to have no solution, and I don't know if we'll ever be free of it.

I think some slight changes to punctuation could improve the impact of your words, e.g:

"This is all by grace
Don't waste your face;
Discriminate the race that's so inconceivable,
So rude and unbelievable.
The man with no plan but world domination
Racial discrimination
Lack of comprehension
Excessive degradation
Of the lower classes
The unsold masses;
The untold duo
Trio
Dodecahedro." - your line breaks act as indicators of pauses, so the commas are a little redundant and make the piece more like a list in places. Normally, I recommend punctuation to people, but some poems work just as well with less.
Just a suggestion.

"I see no season wherein every on lies free," (on = one?)

Like others have said here, that echo of "respect" at the end works really well, like spoken advice or an emotive speech.

Good work. As I said before, a subject worthy of protest.
Thanks for entering it.

[Raef C. Boylan]

A worthy topic for a contest about things to protest against...wake-up call to humanity.
I prefer my anti-prejudice poetry to be more subtle and less one-sided [or have I misunderstood the intent of this - is 'the white man' a specific white man, or whites in general?] I think the dividing fence would have a lot to say if it could, because nowadays seems like racism could be almost completely extinct except that there are ignorant individuals who refuse to change, and also there are habitual grudges among communities. How long do you expect the white people to apologise for something their ancestors did centuries ago? I think it's time for some event that demolishes a hole in history and makes us all glance around and realise the present and future are most important...and netiher are looking too good right now.

Basically, if I've read this piece right, I think it's the kind of writing that contributes to divsions and feeds racisim of the more subtle, hurtful variety.

Racism flows from many angles and I'm tired of it all. Why can't we just get on?
It's this aspect of your message that makes me say well done and thanks for entering this piece into the contest.

It's not going to work. I am sad. Your poem has caused this.
Community spirit is a great thing, but also a killer.

I'm in a weird mood. Maybe I'll come back and read this tomorrow or something, see if it sounds different in my head. Thanks for posting this.

[Blackbirdsong]

This reads like it could be spoken word and I think you should consider doing that if that is something you're interested in.

Some things that stuck to me -

"I see no season wherein every on lies free," or did you mean "every one"

"Respect thy brother
For he is thy brother"

The "thy" stuck out to me because suddenly in this poem which feels pretty modern you have stuck some archaic words that really don't add much to what you're saying. Perhaps you're trying to evoke a feel of Biblical speech, but either way it stuck out to me...not that I'm that important but there you have it.

As always I love your work :)

[Marie]

Nicely done.

[Gandré]

Behold!
We control all the happiness that is ours for the cherishing.
And respect�
Respect.__________________ i loved this part. you are shaking us. well done. thank you for entering my contest. I really loved that poem.

[angelina neves]

very powerful poem...
racism makes no sense... i can't understand how can it exite!!! ... or any kind of descrimination...
and it is not just whites against blacks, it is also blacks against whites, or even more whites against different whites, and blacks against the more blacks... well all around we see racism and descrimination just to justify some maniac "leader" dreams of power! you talk about slavary, but there are slaves yet in many parts of the world... and remember the tribal wars in europe and in Africa - killing "cockroachs" ... or killing "terrorists" or what ever the "enemies" become in the minds of the people that follow some sadic leader...

[Chris Zahar]

You got a really nice rhythm here rhyme going here that has a very powerful rap or Russel Simmons style street poetry vibe going. Your message is very clear, something a lot of poets, including myself, don't take advantage of often enough, and this clearness is precisely what makes it such a hard punch in the face for the reader.