Silhouettes

Summer is my favorite season

I was born in the hazy heat

In the middle of a black and white city

that never goes to sleep

 

I hear a black crow at my window

her song, it frightens me

hard sandels, and coin medallions

a green dress, and Greek keys

 

The things we wanted they came too fast

and now we're stuck dwelling on the past

 

It would have been a boy, if he was real

and I would have named him Simon or James

I would have cried cause he was yours

He would have had a precious face

 

You have Rubies, Turquiose, and Sapphires,

I just have the moon, and a few pearls

You can light yourself on fire if you want to

and I'll smile at the world

 

So take my hand

and say something simple

you said it plenty when I didn't ask

Go on. Say that you love me

I didn't expect much,

I'm okay with that.

 

 

 

 

 

Reviews

[Wolfwind]

This piece is a wealth of diversity at the same moment, solidly deep and emotional. Each stanza could stand alone, conjuring it's own set of images and feelings. Yet when flowing together they fit together and pulsate with a pondering sadness, at the same time a breeze of hope.
Overall I would have to say that I saw this piece as being about young love, bad choices made to soon, a mellow sort of regret at the same time blanketed by wisdom and the need to keep walking forward.

Beautiful Ink!
Aaron

[Kaa Na Kalyanasundaram]

You have Rubies, Turquiose, and Sapphires,

I just have the moon, and a few pearls

You can light yourself on fire if you want to

and I'll smile at the world


.............wow...lovely writing. I like these lines. with wishes.

[V]

this a cute and well-written one. I like the choice of words. Sounds a slightly fairytale-like to me though I can't really explain why. I really like this stanza:
"It would have been a boy, if he was real

and I would have named him Simon or James

I would have cried cause he was yours

He would have had a precious face"
it sort of moves sth, maybe my soul deep inside of me. nice one :)

[Stella]

WOW! I am completely and utterly blown away by your poem. I love how well everything flowed together and the rhyme that you included.

[Patient Poet (Yos)]

So take my hand

and say something simple

you said it plenty when I didn't ask

Go on. Say that you love me

I didn't expect much,

I'm okay with that.


So simple , so romantic ... beautiful :)

[Kyle]

I am not sure if this is a sad situation or a growing situation...

But, i'm not that perceptive so I will just say...

I like the emotion evoked here.

[J Kiplinger Young]

Excellent poem. The first stanza's meter feels a little off.

[EMMIE]

THIS GIVES ME THAT FEEL GOOD FEELING LOVED IT!!! I LOVE THE STYLE IN THIS POEM AND ALL THE WORDS YOU USED. YOU PAINTED A PICTURE. GREAT WORK

[huxleyf]

This took me somewhere I liked being. :)

[Crow]

Beautiful word expression and flow, I think you have touch my soul with this piece.

Well written!