Power

 

POWER

 

 

I wonder if you realize,

Just how much you affect me?

 

If you even know,

That just by your tone,

Can set the mood I’m in?

 

When I see you,

I feel so small,

That at times,

I wish I could hide.

 

When you look at me,

Inside, I’m trembling w/ fear,

Not sure what to expect of you.

 

Don’t you know?

Just how much power you have over me?

 

I try so hard,

To be the person,

You hoped I would be.

 

Yet, through your eyes,

I’m just a failure.

 

I work so hard,

So that you could see,

That I’m not lazy,

As you use to call me.

 

Yet, through your belief,

I am nothing.

 

Why should your opinion?

Matter to me?

 

In statistics or professionals;

They never mention to tell you

The affects your family can have,

When it comes to abuse.

 

 

But whatever it is,

I just know,

I’m always searching for your approval.

 

It’s easier to recover,

When it’s your neighbors, acquaintances, or significant other,

But why is it,

When it’s your own mother,

You can’t seem to escape it?

 

You’re like a ghost,

I just can’t get rid of.

 

You haunt me w/ memories of abuse,

Because of you,

I am never the same.

 

When you look at me,

I just break down and cry.

 

Though, we are far apart,

I can’t seem to understand,

Why I still love you so much.

And why, I thrive to win your approval.

 

I hope someday,

You will see,

That you have lost

A precious daughter

In me.

 

By: Chong N. Kim

10-27-03