A Christmas Heist

A bank robbery turns out to be a family business.

A Christmas Heist

AROUND seven in the morning two days before Christmas Eve, Aron Awbrey woke up after a late night of rough love making. Feeling great, he kissed his wife, naked under the sheets, and stepped into the shower. The day they had been planning for finally arrived. After the shower and a cup of hot, strong, black coffee, he left the apartment, leaving his naked wife in bed.

It was a bright, cold day. He took the city bus to the downtown branch of the F&F Bank. Arriving just in time for the opening, he walked through the doors of the F&F, singing The Twelve Days of Christmas. There were five customers, six staff, and a security guard already in the building. Everyone turned around to see who was singing “On the first day of Christmas my true love sent to me: A Partridge in a Pear Tree…”.

Right after the word “Tree”, Aron, wearing a white medical mask and an Arizona Diamondbacks baseball cap, pulled out a GLOCK 19 Gen4 and put two rounds into the security guard’s eye sockets. Continuing to sing, “On the second day of Christmas my true love sent to me: Two Turtle Doves and a Partridge in a Pear Tree”, he put six more rounds into the legs of three customers and three staff. This put the six wounded on the floor, screaming in agony. The security guard was now laying lifeless in a pool of blood from his own head.

“Lock the f*****g doors!”, Aron shouted to one of the two staff who had not been shot yet.

Continuing to shout, he told everyone else to go to a corner, sit, and face the wall.

“On the third day of Christmas my true love sent to me: three French Hens, two Turtle Doves, and a Partridge in a Pear Tree...”.

Everyone in the bank was terrified. The smell of blood and the sound of people in pain covered the entire bank’s lobby.

“Open the safe and put all of the money in this bag”, he said to the bank staff that had just finished locking the doors. The safe was opened and three 10-strap bundles of one-hundred dollar bills were placed in Aron’s bag.

“On the fourth day of Christmas my true love sent to me: four Calling Birds, three French Hens, two Turtle Doves and a Partridge in a Pear Tree…”

………..

Around nine thirty the same morning, police officer Yasmin, who had just arrived for her shift, was reading a file while humming The Twelve Days of Christmas when the phone rang. There had been a bank robbery at the downtown F&F, and many gun shots were heard from the building. The caller believed there were some customers trapped inside.  She immediately alerted the Captain, and the almost the entire police station rushed out the door. The station was only 100 yards from the bank.

Outside the bank, the Captain, uncertain of what to do, called for Officer Yasmin.

“Yasmin, you’ve had some training on hostage negotiation right?”

“Yes, Captain. But it’s been a long time, and I’ve never had a chance to practice it. I mean we’ve never had this type of situation before.”

“Well, here’s your chance to help us. I want you to make a call to the gunman inside and negotiate the release of the hostages. I’m putting you in charge of this situation.”

“But Captain…”

“You are in charge now Officer Yasmin.”

She made the call to the gunman inside the bank. The Captain stood next to her, listening nervously.

“Yes? The bank is temporary closed. How many I help you?” Aron answer from the phone on the bank manager’s desk.

“This is Officer Yasmin. I’ll be negotiating with you. Please don’t hurt anyone in there. We’re willing to meet your demands.”

She could hear people crying with pain in the background.

“A woman? They put a woman in charge? How insulting!”

“What are your demands? Mr…”

“I already got what I came here for. But there’s one more thing you can do for me.”

“What’s that?”

“I’ll release the hostages if you sing The Twelve Days of Christmas for me. Start from “On the fifth day”.

“What? I don’t get it.”

The Captain also looked confused.

“I’ve already sung to the fourth day. I want you to continue,” Aron explained.

“Alright, On the fifth day of Christmas my true love sent to me: five Golden Rings, four Calling Birds, three French Hens, two Turtle Doves, and a Partridge in a Pear Tree”

“Not bad. You have a beautiful voice.”

Aron hung up the phone, and told the same bank staff to wait five minutes before unlocking the doors. He went to the back of the bank, took off the mask and cap, and sneaked out from a window. He walked to a street corner three blocks away and waited. How easy he thought.

Five minutes later, the police including the Captain stormed into the bank, guns drawn and ready to fire. The scene was chaotic, inside and outside.

At the street corner thee blocks away Aron got into a car.

“You are under arrest!” said the driver.

“Merry Christmas to you too, Officer Yasmin… or shall I say Mrs. Awbrey,” Aron said with a smile.

They kissed while touching the bag filled with three-hundred thousand dollars.

“Where to Mr. Awbrey?”

“Let’s go to Mexico…”

..............................................

The End