Kill or be Killed

Kill or be Killed

     Some extras are killers. Being an extra, can get you killed too. A killer extra, in my humble opinion, is an extra who got booked, as a killer. One of my friends got booked as a killer, who was driving around the country, in a refrigerator truck, loaded with bodies. He had no lines, and you do not see his face, until the very end. This same guy, played a killer, on a short lived crime drama. If memory serves it was called “High Tide.” My friend was shot, and killed by none other than Rick Springfield. He often joked about being killed by a washed up rock star, on a washed up TV show. Billy, my friend, also played an outer space alien, on a sci-fi show. I cannot remember if he killed someone, allowed someone to die, saved someone from dying, got killed himself, or any combination thereof. I just know somebody died. 

     Another guy I know, got booked as one of the henchmen, in the movie, “Last Man Standing. He was a killer too, and since Bruce Willis killed damn near everybody, he could probably say he got shot, and killed, by Bruce Willis. I asked him, how he got the job, and he said, “Casting called me.” I should have known. When I stood in for Paul Sorvino, who was playing a killer in, “Jack of all Trades,” that is how I got the job. Casting called me. Bill Dance called me.

     Of course we get killed, more often than we kill. Just the way it is. Don’t have to like it, but you do have to accept it. I got killed multiple times in, “Independence Day.” Got killed in “Waterworld.” The entire human race dies in “A I.” Got beat up, and robbed in “Good vs. Evil.” I don’t know if they finished me off, or not. I have never seen the show. Got killed by a tidal wave in, “The Core.” The scene is not in the film. We ran, from an invisible tsunami, all day, for nothing. Oh wait, it was next to nothing, because they paid us minimum wage. I have considered purchasing, “The Core,” on DVD, to see if our tsunami is visible in the “Deleted Scenes.” I doubt I will, because when I have previously done this , I was always disappointed. Maybe I could go online, and find it. Even if I do, I am probably not visible. It’s not really that important, but it might be fun, to see myself, and my colleagues, getting killed, by a tsunami. 

     I might have died, on “Carnivale.” Not sure what really happened. I found the body of a naked woman, who had been bleached white, by her killer, in “The Cell.” Of course you don’t see this, but I am visible, in the film. In “American Zombie,” I was already dead, but I wouldn’t lie down. This was a fun shoot, about incorporating zombies, to interact, and work, etc., with the living. We played zombie protesters. Only in America, and only in show business. My friend Mario, got booked as a werewolf once, so I guess you could call him a killer too. Another show where you did not see his face, until he dies, or is caught. Mario was trapped against a high voltage electrical fence, at the end, and enough voltage went through him, to set his fur, on fire. So he died a horrible, nasty, violent death. Casting called him too.

     I got booked as the brother of a victim, on the TV show, “Unsolved Mysteries.” My character name was “Todd.” I cannot remember if my brother was dead, sick, or in a coma. I was at his bedside, in the scene. I don’t even remember what our family name, was supposed to be. I think my mother, and father were present, but I do not remember any other relatives, in the scene. 

     There is a downside to working on this show, or any other show, in this genre, such as, “20/20,” Dateline,” “America’s Most Wanted,” or “American Justice.” A lot of people are unaware that extras are used to portray killers, family members, Fire dept., Police, and FBI, etc. They think the people, on these shows, are real. Some of them are real, but some are not. I heard, on more than one occasion, about an extra, who was detained by police, or had the police called on him, after playing a killer, on one of these shows. One guy was supposedly taken to a police station, and held there, until detectives could contact the production company, and confirm the story, the guy told. “I’m not a killer, but I play one, on TV.” 

     It just goes to show the power of the media, or the stupidity, of some people. Maybe it’s both. I have also heard stories, like this, about day players, and principle actors, so why not extras? I remember when, in 1992, “Murphy Brown,” got pregnant out of wedlock. This actually caused a response from vice president Dan Quayle, about children needing their fathers too. OH MY GOD! A fictional character is going to have a fictional baby, on a fictional TV show! How can we ever survive this? One guy I met, who shall remain nameless, was working pretty steady, on one of the many daytime soap operas. His character was a mean spirited, self centered, a*****e. He said that people had approached him, at the grocery store, wanting to beat him, for being such a jerk. Duh! It’s a TV show! I have been mistaken, for someone else, on at least 2 occasions. Once in Hollywood, and once in New Orleans. One more thing, to be grateful for. 

     I am sure there are more stories, like this, among people, who work, in show business. I am also sure, there are still people, out there, who believe the world is flat, Santa Claus is real, and everything in the newspaper is true. I remember a comic, who said, “I believe that, but I also believe that pastrami, is a color.” People believe some pretty strange things, myself included. Ask me why I believe, in God. I’ll say, “Because mathematical perfection exists, in the universe. Without it, we would not be here.” Just my humble opinion. Thank you very much. Have a nice day. 

     The best story, I ever heard, was about the guy who shot, and killed himself, on camera. This was not a suicide. This guy appeared on one of the many incarnations, of the “Star Trek” franchise. He was a “Starfleet” officer, who killed an outer space alien, with a phaser. He was also the alien. He fires the phaser. Cut to, the alien gets struck, by the blast of energy, and dies. A fine example of how production companies save money. He got paid, a little more, for his performance, but production only had to hire one person, to get the job done. Outstanding! I hope the guy got screen credit.  I believe this, because I was asked to be 2 different characters, when I worked on “Frailty.” Besides, as I said before, “This is show-biz! Anything can happen!” The best thing about being a killer, in show business, is that it’s not really real. It’s all fake. Spoiler alert!