Chapter One: Broken Soul - Broken Skin

____________________________________________________________

Chapter One:

Sitting in my room. Holding my self together, feeling the tears fall down my face as, thought's go though my mind as if, bad thought filter. The more they come though, the more I cry. Hearing my father yelling and screaming down stair's. I wipe my eyes and walk to the window where, I can see the whole town. I always loved looking though my window especially, when during times like these. I open the window and feeling the cool breeze on my painful face as, the tears go down they get so cold feels, like ice's.

Emma, Come down Stairs?

I look at the door and wipe my face again to hide my broken tears that was poured out of my wounded soul. Coming, I told Dad. I fixed my hair while, I was leaving my room. I stud at the top of the stair's and saw is was holding his beer in one hand and the other was, a test that, I got a C- on. He was tapping his food and took a sip of his beer.

Come down here now and took another sip.

I took a deep breath and walked down the stair's. As, I got foot front of him. His hand came part of me and left. I just burst into tears and curled up while, sitting on the steps.

"I have told you how, many times that, No more then a B. You are not going any where and you need to start doing the house work."

He took another sip of his beer.

I looked up to him and having held up tears into my eyes with the make up going down my face.

Yes, Daddy.

I got up and went to the kitchen. I went to the sink and started the hot water. I had to wait for few mins to do the dishes. The hot water takes a while to heat up.

I took a paper towel and wiped my tear's. I throw the towel away and did the dishes. Just in 10 mins, I heard my father snoring and I know he is in his lazy old chair.

I walk in and saw and I was right. I grabbed his beer can and placed it on the table. I grabbed a blanket and covered him.

I just turned around and walked back into the kitchen. Just hearing him groun after he drinks. I just didnt like it. I just finishes the dishes. I also hand dry them. I play them on a towl on the counter and let them dry. I went up stairs and stay up their for the rest of the night.

Just me laying in bed. Holding my pellow so, I dont feel alway alone. I just lay and stair out of the window and watch the dark black change in the bright moon light. I wipe my eyes so, new pain may fall down my face and soak into the pellow that, felt my sorrow. I weep that, felt for hours until, I fell sleep.

Woken up shooken from a load noise from down stair's. I curled up tighter then, I was. I was so teriffied. I just laied their holden my pellow again. I heard foot step's coming up their stairs. I also heard a glass bottle itting the side of the wall. I turned and looked at the bottom of the door to see if, he was coming in. I kept my eyes tored the door. I prayed even, with out knowing it.

For 5 min's, I didnt see aanything but, he came up front of the door and took a deep gulp of his beer that, he just gotten of the fridge. HE always gets a new cold beer even, the one he just had was almost full but, he will never drink a warm beer.

He swong the door wide open." Wintch Where are you?"

I just stayed under the blinket and hoping he will just leave but, he just wobbled over to the bed. I just knew what was coming next. I just took a deep breath.

With him grabbing the blinket and he riped it off. I tired to run for it. " Your going no where, young lady "

I ran around the room and trying to not let him get me. While, he was on the other side of the room, not next to the door. I try to run for it. He grabed my pants. I fell down onto the floor and hit my face really hard. He tried to pull me to him but, he only got my Pj Pants . I didn't know what to do when, I was just in a shirt and my underwear.

He got up and walked to me while, I was leaned up on the wall. I was so scared, I just didn't know what to do. I just froze and spaced out. I looked at when, he got like, 2 feet away from me.

" Why did you have to run like, that? "

Crying so load that, I could believe that, the Mr's and Miss Kerts can hear me next house.

" Come Here"

He took another step

 

" I Said, Come here"

He grabed me from my wrist and yanked me up. It almost like, my hand was going to come off. I stud their in my underwear having my cuts shown but, he couldn't see it cus, its was dark. I know, he didnt care cus, I know what he about to do.

He looked in my blue eyes filled with tears and fear behind them. I just kepted looking into his dark brown eyes that, always filled with hate.

He Grabbed his belt that, fell during the whole, he tried to get me thing.

He raised he hand.

I heard the swing coming and SMACK!

He swong and hit me so many time's that, I didn't know what was the frist or the last. While, he was doing it. He was laughing and he liked it.

I even, heard him say

"Yes, You know Daddy love you."

"Yes, You do."

He made me feel so, sick. He just layed me down on the bed. I could move after he beat me. I didn't know, what time it was. I looked out the window and heard and saw the light from the hallway fade away. When, their was nothing but, he sighting. I just burted into deep crying. I just could hold it anymore.

I went to wipe my face. I saw a dark mark on my arm where he, held me so tight. I felt like, I was watching my self move side to side while, he was wiping me with his belt.

She rub it and thinking, how many time's he has done this to her.

She sat up and wiped her tears away.

Got up and went to the bathroom.

She opened the door a bit and looked where, he was. She looked down the stair's and saw him sitting in his chair though the shadow from the Tv. He just popped open another beer and laughed as, something funny happened on the tv show he was watch. He acted like, he didn't do anything just, few min's ago.

I turned and looked at the bathroom. My blond hair made some ruffle noise. I flintched and looked back down on the wall where, I can see my father shadow.

He said, " Little girl, You better be in bed?"

I didn't move.

He scuffle and sat down and watched his show.

I went back in my room and went into my drawer. I grabed a sharp knife and taped it. I rushed into the bathroom. I opened the door slowly. I took my time to shut the door so, He dont hear me.

I turned on the light and looked at my self in the mirror.

With my ruffed up hair

Marks all over my arms.

Black eye and a busted up lip.

I just couldn''t remember him hitting me so much. I took a deep breath. I pulled my arm and with my wrist facing up with my old cut's that, He didn't care.

Slit One..

Slit Two..

Slit Three..

Feeling the bloon rin down my arm and didn't care where, it lands. I just want to keep cutting till, the pain and shame is all gone.

I looked over to the bathtube. I just had to.

I grabed a towel told held it over my cut so, the blood wont drip onto the floor.

I went to look if, he still up. I went down stair's and saw him sleeping. I went back up stairs and shut and locked the door.

I run the bath and made sure the water was hot. The hotter the better. I took my clothes off and placed it on tolet seat. I placed the knife on top of my clothes. I took my step into the hot water soon, to be my red water resting place.

I eased my sefl to lay down into the hot steaming water that, will soon take my last bit of life. I will have no more beatting, no more smacking, no more brusie's, no more unwanted bleeding. No more father touching me.

I just spoke to my self. Took a deep breath, I grabbed the knife. I put the knife on my arm and I started to cut. feeling my cool air hit my body. I felt more light headed before when, I started. I cut real deep in my arm and I did my other arm.

I lay down into the water soon, to be my grave.

I felt my pain, my tear's, my bitterness to be gone. I staarted to not feel much of my body.

I took my last breath and said, Good Bye World!

" Beep Beep Beep "

____________________________________________