Introduction.. The Cries of the Unfortunate

prolouge/introduction/beginning-ish

The laughter of children filled the air whilst the morning birds sang their magical song.  With the strain from the light that seeped in through the unwashed cloth curtains, Haiku opened one azure red eye lazily.  "..." He sat up hesitantly and rubbed his eyes, letting out a leisurely yawn.  He wanted to remain in the safe haven of his room, but he knew the day awaited him outside.  He grabbed his white robe and threw it on.  There was no special event today, so no need to be formal.  He walked slowly towards the pond near his hut that was glistening with rain water from the late night.  He dipped his hands into the fresh, wet, and most importantly, cold water.  He let a shiver run through him as he tried to get used to the temperature.  He splashed the water joyously onto his face, expecting another chill to follow.  He shook his hands until they were dry and wiped his brow clean.  It just felt like today was going to be a good day.

 

He raised himself from his spot next to the pond and started to head back towards the other huts.  Curious as to what his friends would be up to on such a fine day.  He enjoyed the people around him, for the most part anyways.  Being apart of the White Light clan, it was hard to figure out who was stable and who.. wasn't.  Just a few days ago reports had been going around about how one of their kin had broken down at the Meeting of Delegates for each Light clan to see how things were coming along.  All that the delegate could do was crouch down into a little ball and shudder.  His face contorted with so many different emotions, but so much pain..  and then the unthinkable happened.  He let go of his strength and the area around him, along with him, was disintegrated within seconds.  No one escaped.  ..With all the great power that is locked up inside of each light...Only the white clan is subject to this horrendous burst, but normally only those who are under severe mental pressure.  This wasn't Haiku's top priority, however.  He was only 17 winters, and he considered that the age to be non-caring.

 

He glanced from side to side as he tried to spot where his friends would be.  Perhaps they had gone out to the meadow?  Maybe even the stream, or perhaps... He stopped abruptly as he looks down at the decapitated bodies of his former playmates.  He stared for a long time, shock took over his being and began to make him quake.  He stepped back and turned away from the hideous sight. ..What was going on..?  He began to run into the forest surrounding his village, just to get as far from that scene as possible.  Tears blinded him as he dashed from side to side, doing his best to avoid the trees and the shrubbery.  His ears perked as he heard a blood curdling cry that seemed to come from the direction of his village.. It sounded like his father, who had formerly been away with the other men of the tribe to hunt.  He couldn't stand it any longer.  Maybe it was just a dream.  Maybe he drank too much Pucha juice last night before he went to sleep.  He fell to his knees and became unconscious.  Unaware that he is the last person in his village to survive the unexpected and brutal massacre.

Reviews

[Nicholas Hagenschneider]

i reviewed this but my computers f*****g up so i shall restart. good to see you fixed your typo but you should throw the word "and" in there. and i also think you moved alittle to quickly. before tha massacre, you should have allowed the reader to know how close he was to his friends and father, have the main character converse with other characters. overall it is good.