CLOSE TOGETHER

Fighting Flames and fires

Tangled in electric wires

We are falling apart still we hold together

 

Drowning in our own lies we die

Losing our strength we cry

 

Inked with fear of losing ourselves

But colored tattoos fade

Colorful dreams become black instead

 

There are screams instead of laughs

Happy farms become graves

 

Frozen in the time we felt happy but we can’t bring it back

 

“Let’s go home.” He said

Where we are free to be scared

Free to cry

Free to be dead

 

Maybe life gives us chances we fail to succeed

From 100 falling to 0

From the cradle to the grave life stayed the same

Don’t know but we still stay close…… close together

Reviews

[barleygirl]

Your poem sounds like a gushing stream of ideas full of imagery, sensory observations, & interesting sporadic rhymes. My favorite part is the "tattoo" idea . . . they are always so bright & lovely for the first few years, then they seem to fade to all-the-same-color after awhile. That's an excellent analogy for love. I feel inspired to write a poem comparing tattoos & love! Thanks for the spark of an idea . . . your poem takes the reader in many relatable directions! (((HUGS)))

[Urja Gokani]

thanks a lot (hugs back) :)

[jacob erin-cilberto]

bittersweet idea...life giving us chances to fail...

yet if we stay close and lean on each other, these chances could be for success...and maybe the laughs could still come.

j.

[Urja Gokani]

thanks a lot :)

[Tazeen Ahmed]

Well written !
I love the alliteration used in the first line...

A way to keep writing:)

[Urja Gokani]

thanks a lot :)

[Emily]

The 3rd stanza was my favorite!
Keep on writing!!

[Urja Gokani]

thanks a lot :)

[iamshadowine]

i like this one. well described poem
keep writing :D

[Urja Gokani]

thanks a lot :)

[An owl on the moon]

Such strength flows through the fire, and yes, life is a climb, it's a fight, and even in the falling we learn to fly together. Your words are so moving.

[Urja Gokani]

thanks a lot :)